I dont want to spend another night crying over what we could have been
Lost somewhere in the back of my head crying out again
Screaming your name into the wind
I just wanted you to take my hand
Pull me closer
Don’t push me down
I wanted to be part of your world forever
Didn’t know I was gonna drown if I stayed
Didn’t know you’d end up feeling this way
I didn’t see the flags
I was color blind
when I think about love that’s hurt me so bad I couldn’t breath drowning in my sleep
Waking in cold sweat
Having nightmares about you
I’ve learned to understand romantic love isn’t the only kind that can break you
in fact that don’t even hurt as much as being hurt by someone who raised you
They were supposed to be the one that stuck by me
Not the first to toss me aside when I didn’t end up like they wanted me to
Oh what did I do to make you stop loving me
You taught me how to swim
How to work hard
How to give
How to grow and take care of myself
You also taught me not to love myself
You brought out my insecurities
You made me fold in on myself
You made me into a shell of what I once was
You broke me with underhanded jabs about my body
Told me I was to stupid to think for myself
That I’d never amount to nothing in my life
Told me no one would love how I was
Running through my head all these emotions you gave me
Degrading me
You call yourself a mother
But your only a mother to kids who aren’t yours
Ones you can’t control
I don’t know what it was about us that made you treat us different from all of them.
Why could you just love them
But you couldn’t just love me
I just wanted you to love me without trying to turn me into something
I wanted to grow into my own person
Not just the human you forced me to be
And that you could toss me aside without a care in the word.
Kick me to the curb like it made you happy to see me go
Made you happy to make me cry
Was you favorite pastime to try and make me seem like I was loosing my mind
Made me loose my damn mind
For someone who preached honesty
You one of the biggest liars I’ve ever met
And you do it so well
None of your friends know what your really like inside your own home
And you can call me a liar you tell everyone all the stories you made up about me to made them see me so horribly
You painted a picture turned yourself into a a saint but I still know there’s horns behind your halo.
Even if no one else sees
I still know what you did behind the walls you like to hide behind
