Ladies and gentlemen… boys and ghouls…
Step right up for a prehistoric delight,
He’s sharp, he’s snappy,
And he’s been extinct longer than your ex’s attention span!”
Kabutops in a zoot suit, creepin’ from the tar,
Two scythes gleamin’ brighter than a used Dodge car.
Got that Beetlejuice grin, and a Disney villain stance,
Moonwalkin’ on fossils like it’s Thriller by chance.
Swingin’ those blades like Sinatra with a grin,
Drinkin’ gin with Jack Skellington, let the nightmare begin.
Claws on the radio, scratchin’ up the sound,
Prehistoric predator, the creepiest cat in town.
Tim Burton carnival, neon in the rain,
Kabutops cuts the dance floor like a Tarantino frame.
He’s the Alastor of the ocean, radio voice divine,
Sells souls for martinis with a twist of lime.
Netflix called, they want a docu-series deal,
“Tiger King, but with fossils” — baby, let’s seal.
Swingin’ with demons in a speakeasy haze,
Got Joker’s laugh and Gomez Addams’ gaze.
Claws on the radio, scratchin’ up the sound,
Prehistoric predator, the creepiest cat in town.
Silent-film murder with a Chaplin twirl,
Kabutops owns the night like a Burton girl.
Bridge (chaotic breakdown, circus vibes)
Step right up, folks, don’t lose your head,
He’ll slice you cleaner than your OnlyFans thread.
It’s TikTok fame with a murderous swing,
#KabutopsChallenge — watch the bodies fling!
He’s got swagger like Alastor, manners like a snake,
Plays roulette with Cthulhu, all gas, no brake.
In the underworld ballroom, he’s the master of show,
Sharp-dressed fossil in a monochrome glow.
Claws on the radio, tune into the sin,
Kabutops with a big band, let the bloodbath begin.
Creepy cabaret with a devilish tone,
Your prehistoric nightmare’s on the microphone.
“Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
Extinction? Oh darling… that was just the opening act.”
Classy
