Odd Slots

Boom-chicka-boom, boom-chicka-boom

I left Wanda at the slots… and I might’ve pawned her crown.

(doo-doo-doo!)

⸻

I’m Cosmo, baby, green-haired clown,

Rockin’ Vegas like a broke Flintstone in town.

Got kicked outta Circus Circus ‘cause I thought it was a zoo,

Fed the tigers Red Bull, now they’re suing me too.

⸻

🎶 What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas,

Unless Vicky films it for pay-per-view! 🎶

I’m makin’ bad choices with the Powerpuff voices,

And Courage the Cowardly Dog’s doin’ shots ‘til he pukes on my shoes!

⸻

Johnny Bravo’s flexin’ in the bathroom mirror,

Told me “hey pretty mama”—but he hit on the dealer.

Ed, Edd, and Eddy sold me fake chips out back,

I tried to cash ‘em in, they just said “scam attack!”

⸻

I married a slot machine—

(divorce in 10 minutes flat!)

Lost my wand at a strip club—

(now the strippers can grant wishes, how ‘bout that?)

Scooby and Shaggy bet it all on snacks,

Now Velma’s pole-dancing just to get their cash back!

⸻

Shoo-bee-doo, wop-bam-boom!

I’m the dumbest fairy in the neon gloom!

Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom, ka-ching!

Timmy’s at home, but I’m losing my wings!

⸻

🎶 What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas,

Unless Dexter livestreams the crime! 🎶

I’m drunk on daiquiris, forgot my ovaries—

Wait, do fairies have those? (…Wanda said not this time.)

⸻

I’ll wake up tomorrow in SpongeBob’s pants,

No idea how… but I lost my stance.

If Wanda asks, just tell her quick:

“Cosmo went to Vegas… and got real sick.”

doo-wop-doo… cha-ching!