Angry

I said I’m tired of being…, this so fucking angry, But I don’t change a thing..someone come and pray with me but I don’t say a thing…., I don’t say a thing….., [Beat Drops] I’ve lost all meaning of being me but here still lies the truth I’ll have to hold on too, cuz I can’t say a word with a person in the room..I’ve lost all my glory in this new version of me, my scars are still hurting but I can’t let it take blame for me I wanna see me in the light but I choose to keep shaming me I know my stories from my past are what’s getting to me….cuz I just wanna live in the moments again which makes me infuriated,Cuz being mad is easier then crying and letting my people see my true feelings..I don’t know why this would happen to me and now I’m here hating life waiting for the next big thing, what’s it’s gonna be show me whats the next thing show who I am now cuz this ain’t who I wanna be anymore it’s making me change into an empty unhealthy mess..and I can’t be nothing else..which why is I’m so tired of being so fucking angry and I take it out on who I love but most of it all my mom and I’m sorry that I don’t say a thing…., that I don’t say a thing…., I’m glad your still here for me..cuz I know it can be difficult to deal with the way it is now..but your the trooper I know I can’t be but I try for you so you see that there’s no bitch in me but honestly the world isn’t set for us, once you’re different you become irrelevant to it..and it’s some bullshit cuz I’m still the person I was before or that wanna be but I’m just so fucking angry that I lose the meaning of it while losing me with it, no one ever understands the words I bleed that it’s always oh you’ll get through it..you’re still alive that’s good ain’t it...yeah and now I’m alone with the one friend who doesn’t see a change in me the only person who knows my true story understanding what it’s like to be me, it’s pretty hard dealing with my life now every single day I wonder how I’m going to get through this okay but manage to complete destroy me instead cuz memories reply to me and wanting to move with them that I smoke my brain away so hopefully that I can separate reality and play the game so I can win, so I can stop being so fucking angry…so I can have my wayy.. but I just don’t say a thing….., I don’t say a thing….. I know I’m probably crying about something that is nothing to who doesn’t care and that’s fine I’m aware I can be a bit of a babble and carry on and on on how this isn’t for your ears but I’m still saying cheers to it as clouds cover up this screen while I’m writing this and “we” won’t say a thing… we won’t say a thing….