Please Hear me; Please Feel me

I learned how to disappear

Without leaving the room

Smile at the table

While dying in plain view

Cause people love function

Not the man underneath

So I gave them strength

And hid the part begging to breathe

I keep talking louder

But nobody turns around

So I pour my soul in lyrics

Hoping pain makes a sound

Please hear me

Please see me

Please feel that I’m alive

Cause I’m screaming through a smile

Just to prove there’s something inside

I speak so you’ll hear me

I write so you’ll feel me

Cause silence makes me vanish

And I’m terrified I’m nothing

If nobody can feel me

Every touch becomes a question

Every silence feels like proof

That I’ll never be enough

To be fully chosen too

And I hate that validation

Feels like oxygen to me

Like desire equals value

Like being wanted lets me breathe

So when moments crack my chest open

I spiral into doubt

Not because I didn’t feel love

But because I couldn’t feel myself

And that’s the part nobody sees

The war beneath my skin

How every room I walk into

Feels like I must earn existing in

Please hear me

Please see me

Please tell me I am real

Cause I’m drowning in my own head

And music’s all that people feel

I speak so you’ll hear me

I write so you’ll feel me

Cause if my pain can move you

Then maybe I still matter

Maybe I’m still here

I don’t want pity

I don’t want saving

I just want someone

To stop overlooking me

To look past the calm voice

The jokes

The confidence

The control

And notice

I am begging

To be felt

Please hear me

Before I fade into the walls

Please see me

Before there’s nothing left at all

I turned my wounds to music

Cause bleeding wasn’t enough

And if these words can shake you

Maybe I deserve love

I speak so you’ll hear me

I write so you’ll feel me

Cause being unseen

Has always been

My deepest fear