(Verse 1)
You’re scared to give yourself all of me…
‘Cause you did that once before and it didn’t end the way you prayed it would.
But she wasn’t me.
And I’m thankful she dropped the ball… ‘Cause I won’t.
If you wanna know the truth behind this cool, calm, collected smile everybody thinks they know…
Hiding’s always been easy.
I learned from the best.
Fake every feeling. Bury the rest.
Cut the loud emotions off before they ever breathe.
Turn the quiet ones down ‘til they’re humming underneath.
The ones that catch me by surprise get caught inside my chest… they never make it to my eyes.
So if I look okay… don’t mistake surviving for peace.
(Pre-Chorus)
I flipped my heart to the “off” position… Then somewhere along the way I threw away the switch.
Now every wall I built is cracking…
And somehow… you’re the reason why.
(Chorus)
I’m not scared of loving you…
I’m scared you’ll finally know me.
The little girl still standing at the top of those stairs… still wondering why she wasn’t enough.
I’m scared you’ll touch the parts of me I’ve spent my whole life hiding…
And if you leave…
I don’t know how to teach those pieces to disappear again.
Maybe trust ain’t something you wait for…
Maybe it’s something you choose.
And somehow…
you became worth being afraid for.
(Verse 2)
You ask me why silence feels like violence.
Why “I’m fine” never sounds true.
Why I memorize your voice like tomorrow isn’t promised.
Baby… this story didn’t start with you.
My mother called me a mistake.
To an adult, that’s circumstance.
To a child… that’s identity.
I spent my whole childhood trying to earn what should’ve been free.
I’d stand at the top of the stairs begging to be punished…
Because punishment still meant she came.
When you’re starving for love… even pain can feel like affection.
Then I watched Superman die in slow motion.
Hospital rooms. Chemo. Hope. Fear. Repeat.
Fifteen years old… and grief moved in before I learned how to drive.
Everybody kept leaving.
Houses. Friends. Family. People I trusted.
Turns out… grief has a body count.
(Bridge)
So no… I’m not afraid of fights.
I’m not afraid of tears.
I’ve survived storms my whole life.
What scares me… is distance.
Silence.
The feeling that somebody’s halfway out the door.
Because every goodbye I’ve ever known… started quietly.
And every version of me learned the same lesson…
Love leaves.
Love leaves.
Love leaves.
(Final Chorus)
But then… you showed up.
Thirty years of evidence saying nobody stays… standing face to face with one girl proving all of it wrong.
You didn’t just love me…
You loved the little girl still waiting at the top of those stairs…
The teenager watching her father disappear…
The woman who kept surviving when surviving was all she knew.
Every ghost…
Every scar…
Every chapter…
You looked at all of them…
Then looked at me…
And instead of walking away…
you picked every broken piece up…
Held it close…
Looked me in the eyes…
And whispered…
“Baby… I’m here now. You never had to earn this.”
LyssDymension
