I’m not explaining pain to a grown-ass woman,
you knew me better than anyone—don’t play dumb, you saw it coming.
You felt the shift the second it hit,
and still didn’t hesitate—yeah, that’s the difference.
I would’ve waited, doubled back, canceled plans, rerouted,
I would’ve showed up tired, broke, no excuses, still celebrated.
Whole damn month for you—oh wait, I did that already,
October hit, midnight first, happy birthday, steady.
2:58 a.m., birth time memorized,
’cause the moment you existed mattered in my eyes.
Filled the tank, drove to Galveston,
put you on a cruise, had strangers celebrating you for fun.
Whole boat clapping, every detail handled,
all expense paid ’cause I meant it, no angle.
Your day, your month, your life, your worth—
so explain to me why mine didn’t deserve the same work.
Was I real or just convenient?
A placeholder friend you drained till I was depleted?
What I don’t get—how did this benefit you?
It didn’t.
Now you drive yourself, pride riding shotgun,
walk past me like I’m dead, laugh like my pain’s nothing.
“Typical of her,” you tell my mom—nah, that’s vicious,
a typical day for me was carrying you like a business.
Driving your ass to work, losing sleep just so you’re okay,
bleeding hours so you never had to feel the weight.
Fuck you for knowing my past and pressing it deeper,
that wasn’t accidental—that was you being strategic.
You didn’t just hurt me, you hurt yourself too,
and I don’t know which is worse—me still caring or you acting brand new.
I still worry about you, that’s the part that’s sick,
you don’t even acknowledge I exist.
Maybe you’re not who I thought you were.
Maybe you are and I ignored every warning I heard.
Maybe you never really knew me at all—
but you knew I was hurting, you heard the fall.
And you chose to make it worse.
That’s not confusion, that’s character, that’s a choice you rehearsed.
Don’t offer silence like it’s growth or grace,
you didn’t freeze—you proceeded, then cleared your plate.
No closure talks.
No empty words.
You already said enough with the way you moved first.
Because that lesson cost me everything—
I made sure you were full.
You made sure I wasn’t there.
That’s not miscommunication.
That’s a choice.
And I finally heard it loud and clear.
So stay mad, stay down — I don’t care.
You wanna blame someone?
Look in the mirror.
LyssDymension
