[Verse 1]
I was mindin’ my business
Just sippin’ that brown
Then the bourbon on the counter
Started dancin’ like a clown (what the…)
Did a backflip on the coaster
Hit the table
Stuck the landing
Then it winked and did a pelvis thrust
I was not prepared for that understanding
[Chorus]
That bourbon doing a fucking fucking
Had me frozen in my stance
I laughed so hard
I cried
Then cursed
I straight up shit my pants (oh damn)
It shook my soul
It shook my gut
It shook my drink right out my hand
That bourbon doing a fucking fucking
Turned my night into a one-man band
[Verse 2]
It was so damn aggressive
Like it trained for this all year
Hit a twerk
Hit a spin-kick
Knocked my snack right off the chair
I jumped up
Kicked the air
Felt like some drunk-ass movie star
Yelled
“I’m kicking ass with liquor glasses”
Then I fell into the bar (hey!)
[Chorus]
That bourbon doing a fucking fucking
Had me frozen in my stance
I laughed so hard
I cried
Then cursed
I straight up shit my pants
It shook my soul
It shook my gut
It shook my drink right out my hand
That bourbon doing a fucking fucking
Is my stupid favorite cover band
[Bridge]
Bartender said
“You good
Man?”
I said
“Buddy
I’m transformed”
“I just watched a bottle grind so hard
It changed my life and broke my norms”
If dumb is fun then I’m a genius
Raise that glass and take a chance
‘Cause when bourbon starts a fucking fucking
You might just kick some cosmic ass
[Chorus]
That bourbon doing a fucking fucking
Had me frozen in my stance
I laughed so hard
I cried
Then cursed
I straight up shit my pants
It shook my soul
It shook my gut
It shook my drink right out my hand
That bourbon doing a fucking fucking
Is the dumbest anthem of this land