I want to crawl out of my own skin
peel it back like wet clothes after rain
but it won’t come off
it just clings tighter
after every episode
the screaming stays inside the bones
I can't say it's anything I would of chose
But what's the use in talking to you
All I'm doing is making up excuses
To be fucking miserable, only language I'm fluent in
You said what's the use, why bother to tune in
Whats the use, I'm already ruined
I can’t get away from myself, or I would
no door far enough
no road long enough
so I do the only thing left, the rest drift away
I can't follow, damn it's crazy, what a mess I make
So I watch as they all go, without me,
No I don't follow
I fade
I sink back into the dark behind my eyes
that’s the only place the world can stand me
because out here I’m too loud,
For so small, I'm loud though
too sharp to swallow
Can't turn down, I'm just
too much, too far to go
the volume’s broken, oh wow
stuck screaming
Can't figure out how to turn it down
so I lock myself deep in my head
sit on the floor with my doubts
let them talk shit
l so small, I'
let them swing
I just take it
I stick it out
until they finally beat me flat
They tell me I'm worthless
I believe it
then I crawl back up
out of the hole
face smeared
eyes red
looking like a fucking clown
and everybody sees it
I’m at my worst
and it shows
every single day
I still can’t figure out the highs and the lows
they come when they want
leave when they want
I’m just the ride they’re on
Nothing I would of chose
so when it gets too loud again
I fade
I fade
I fade
back into the only place
that’s ever been safe