will I be proud of the man I was and the life I lived when I take my last breath?
we don’t have the answers to the questions that we haven’t asked yet.
panic stricken anxiety strikes me from my head to my toes when faced with my faith
and wondering will I end up in heaven or down below
or if either one even exist.
I long for the answer and I am not a believer in the philosophy that ignorance is bliss
will I become everything I wanted to be or will I miss?
I was once at peace
a happy child filled with innocence
wasting my days in the garden of Eden
but like Adam I ate the apple and was casted out never to return again
as adults they say we grow up and mature but is it really maturity or just the slow death of a pure heart?
we all want to find the path to heaven but how can we get there if we never make an attempt to start?
the pain is addicting, bright lights causing migraines so maybe that’s why we choose to live in the dark
the flood came but I am not noah
and there’s only demons that I carry on my arc
there is hope in hopelessness
there is care in carelessness
and rest in restlessness
that is the emphasis that is often dismissed
in disarray and confusion
challenges arrive like storms
and grow like thorns on a rose
left alone in an empty garden
and it’s up to us to find a solution
the sword of Damocles hovers above my head
I thought I wanted this only to find out I would rather go back to how it used to be instead
was I blind on my own accord or mislead?
ive become unraveled like ancient scrolls that were never meant to be opened
carrying a long lost message
frozen in time
they say to be aware and open up your third eye
but God created us with two eyes only so what is the repercussion in trying to be wise?
Casey_Von
