(Verse 1)
He sits alone in his basement glow,
Got a glitchy mouse and a voice that ain’t so low.
Thinks magic plasma orbs tell the truth untold,
But the truth is he’s just bitter and cold.
He scrolls through feeds with a jealous frown,
Zooms in on a smile just to tear it down.
Sees Professor Dave with a life he’ll never find,
So he lashes out in a manic spiral of his broken mind.
(Chorus)
He said, “Don’t worry, Dave, I’ll take good care,
Of your wife and kids when you’re not there.”
Like a vulture circlin’ ‘round a man’s lovely wife,
Spewin’ threats like he’s done, all throughout his life.
But he don’t know love, and wouldn’t know grace,
Cuz he’s never held a woman in a warm embrace.
Just rage and Reddit and a world that’s fake—
Lord, how much can one ginger break?
(Verse 2)
If Ashton’s kissed a girl ever, it ain’t been since dial-up days,
Still thinks emotional manipulation’s how you get ‘em to stay.
Watches rom-coms with tears in drink after drink,
Tries to talk tough, but scared of what folks think.
Got a shrine built out of screenshots and spite,
Hopes one more shit post will make him feel alright.
But no screenshots don’t heal a boy’s empty bed,
So he posts again, tryin’ to get in the Professor’s head.
(Chorus)
He said, “Don’t worry, Dave, I’ll take good care,
Of your wife and kids when you’re not there.”
Like a vulture circlin’ ‘round a man’s lovely wife,
Spewin’ threats like he’s done, all throughout his life.
But he don’t know love, and wouldn’t know grace,
Cuz he’s never held a woman in a warm embrace.
Just rage and Reddit and a world that’s fake—
Lord, how much can one ginger break?
(Bridge)
Inn sell dreams, wrapped in fake bravado,
Thinks stalking’s just a game, and some hero’s motto.
But posting a man’s family pics, just to feel big?
That’s not a sad little boy, that’s just a ginger pig.
(Final Chorus)
He said, “Don’t worry, Dave, I’ll take good care,
Of your wife and kids when you’re not there.”
Like a vulture circlin’ ‘round a man’s lovely wife,
Spewin’ threats like he’s done, all throughout his life.
But he don’t know love, and wouldn’t know grace,
Cuz he’s never held a woman in a warm embrace.
Just rage and Reddit and a world that’s fake—
You know what? You’re done — just shut the fuck up, Tray.
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