[trap][gangsta d&b rap][dark rave]
[Raspy husky female]
[Verse 1]
So sick so stuck in bed
illnesses appeared I'm scared
Everyday back sore
Sleep off that back pain & more
couldnt stay awake
Age 12 me & my dad half moved
26 years No relief
So I tried something
Which turned out to be
the one thing to truly help me
& even though it's hard to admit
It's my truth no matter how you look at it
You may not agree
Might see me differently
But all I have for proof
Is the me standing infront of you
I dont use it to escape
But for relief from the pain
& gain
The energy I need
To heal & learn to regulate
Gave my body a break
From surviving in that state
[Hook]
Its hard to admit
When others associated with it
Is seen as all the same
A drug addict that should hang their head in shame
But I needed healing
Needed to find the reason I was feeling
So sick in pain hidden unseen
Its scary to say
But
I used methamphetamine
[Verse 2]
Mental health fooled my mind
To think I'm the broken kind
I would try my best
But I was so sore in pain & depressed
Showing it, I felt guilty
Hiding it used all of my energy
I became unbearable & needy
But its cos I was so tired
So sleepy & weepy & an emotional heapy
Nobody was allowed to see
But I wouldve done anything to be free
Pain in silence every day
Listening to people say
she's just faking it, she's actually fine
She's a hypochondriac
She exaggerates all the time
She's lazy its manipulation
To control you & the situation
Thats why she pretends to be sick
Don't be a fool don't fall for it
It's sad
People thought I was like that
Pretending to be sick
Trading life for this
I could never understand why
Someone would even do that cos all I
Do is lay here
& cry & cry
& try
not to think that I wish I was dead
But hey.. yea.
Its just all in my head
[Hook]
[Bridge][husky female gangsta trap rap][fast]
If used as intended
It probably would
Help some people like me, feel seen & understood
If medical professionals could
Actually hear me
They might see I found something
Medically it should
Be bad but in me it does good
Cos like with everything
with care & moderation
Whats not helpful to some
Can be, in another situation
Its not the thing its mostly the user
Those who do too much, over do it & abuse it
The good it does, doesnt matter anymore
Cos they're brains didnt care
They chose to ignore
Thats what self control is for
So yes I use methamphetamine
But different to how some do on the street
Those you give the crackhead name
Usually have stayed awake for too many days
Gone- Waaayyy too long
Without food
Starving their body into a bad mood
Psychosis paranoia, scattered & delirious
Noone sees you as serious
Cos oh - oh yea "theyre just on meth"
But same would happen to anyone without rest
No food & nothing to drink
Its not just the drug, like you might think
Most people use it to run from shit
But jokes on them it can heighten it
Thats when they get paranoid
Cos somehow they get what they tried to avoid
Makes em crazy
angry & annoyed
[Hook]
WorldsDrone08
