(Verse 1)
It wasn’t a moment, it wasn’t a text
It wasn’t the question of who might be next
It was a pattern, a slow-rolling tide
Of everything you were determined to hide
I was the one who was present and real
While you gave away every spark you could feel
I’m standing right here, but the chair’s getting cold
The story is ending before it’s been told.
(Chorus)
And that’s what the infidelity was for me
The locking of doors and the hiding of keys
A world you were building where I couldn’t go
A life in the shadows I wasn’t to know
It’s the weight of the silence, the flickering light
The ghost of a partner who’s gone in the night
You got the freedom, I got the limits
And I lost myself every minute I was in it.
(Verse 2)
The screens looked wrong and the access was gone
I’m chasing the truth from the dusk till the dawn
But every time that I questioned the lie
You looked at me with that look in your eye
Like I was the problem, the one who was "mad"
For wanting the honesty we should’ve had
You kept me small and you kept me confused
While you used the trust that I never refused.
(Bridge)
Secret attention and secret validation
A digital wall and a deep isolation
I was committed, I stayed on the line
While you kept your options away from the vine
It’s the gaslighting burn, it’s the "over-reacting"
While all of my spirit was slowly subtracting.
(Chorus)
And that’s what the infidelity was for me
The locking of doors and the hiding of keys
A world you were building where I couldn’t go
A life in the shadows I wasn’t to know
It’s the weight of the silence, the flickering light
The ghost of a partner who’s gone in the night
You got the freedom, I got the limits
And I lost myself every minute I was in it.
(Outro)
The biggest betrayal wasn’t the act
It was the silence, the cold-blooded fact
That I’m losing myself just to hold onto you
When you aren’t holding me, too.
No, you aren't holding me, too.
(Fade out)
It was the loneliness.
The darkness.
The pattern.
