I Feel...

mm-mm

too much again

yeah-yeah

I carry everything inside my chest

like if I hold it quietly it hurts less

but every little crack is showing now

and I don't know how to calm myself down

the nights get longer

my head gets loud

silence feels heavier all around

I’m tired of pretending I’m okay

just because I survived another day

cause nobody sees

the war in my mind

they just see me smiling

while I’m falling behind

I feel alone

even in crowded rooms

feel unloved

like everybody leaves too soon

I feel angry

at the things I can’t change

feel broken

like pain got stitched into my veins

and I hate how bad I need

someone to hold me together

cause lately I swear

I’m falling apart under pressure

oh-oh

falling apart again

yeah-yeah

too tired to pretend

I don’t know when

I started feeling this empty

when my own reflection

started looking unfamiliar to me

I miss the girl

who used to dream at night

now I just lie awake

trying to survive my mind

and maybe that’s why

I disappear sometimes

cause talking hurts

when you can't explain your life

I keep everything buried

till my body starts hurting too

I feel alone

like nobody really sees me

feel unwanted

even when people need me

I feel tired

all the way through my bones

like I’ve been carrying heartbreak

completely on my own

and I hate how badly I want

someone to stay beside me

without me fearing

they’ll wake up and decide to leave

I don’t wanna feel abandoned

every time the silence comes

don’t wanna overthink love

till it destroys me from inside

I just wanna feel safe

for once in my life

safe enough to breathe

safe enough to stop surviving

I feel alone

but somehow still reaching out

still hoping somebody

will understand me now

I feel damaged

but there’s still a heart in me

still beating

through every memory

and maybe that means

I’m not as gone as I think

maybe I’m just exhausted

from trying not to sink

mm-mm

too much again

(still here though)

yeah-yeah

still here