Intro – Melodic / Dreamy / Floating Vibe]
Yeah…
Jack in my hand, demons in my head
They said I need meds
But they never said why I still feel dead
[Hook – Melodic / Juice WRLD inspired tone]
I been trippin’ off tabs just to find my peace
Still can’t sleep, got war in me
They said I’m sick, I said, “Tell me what’s sane?”
Poppin’ prescriptions that poison my brain
It’s my BPD, got me up and down
One day I’m the king, next day I drown
I don’t trust the pills that they gave to me
So I light it up just to breathe…
Yeah, it’s my BPD
[Verse 1 – Technical / Emotionally Sharp / Joyner-inspired]
Risperidone had me feelin’ like a mannequin
Fluoxetine made me dull, I was panickin’
Olanzapine? Shit, that was the worst
I was smilin’ on the surface while I prayed for a hearse
I ain’t tryna be numb, I just wanna be me
But I’m caught between chaos and apathy
One voice tellin’ me “Live,” the other “Leave”
It’s a tug-of-war and I’m wearin' the leash
Shrooms in my system, tryin’ to find God
Acid in my veins just to beat the odds
Weed got me calm, but the bottle talks louder
Said if I wanna fly, I gotta burn like powder
They call it disorder, I call it design
If feelin’ too much is a crime — then I’m doin’ my time
[Pre-Chorus – Tension Building / Spoken-Sung]
I don’t need to be sedated
I just need to feel awakened
And I been on this edge too long
Tryna balance right and wrong
[Hook – Repeat / Bigger]
I been trippin’ off tabs just to find my peace
Still can’t sleep, got war in me
They said I’m sick, I said, “Tell me what’s sane?”
Poppin’ prescriptions that poison my brain
It’s my BPD, got me up and down
One day I’m the king, next day I drown
I don’t trust the pills that they gave to me
So I light it up just to breathe…
Yeah, it’s my BPD
[Verse 2 – Kanye-inspired / Spoken Word with Rhythm / Emotional Control]
They tried to box me in with a bottle and a name
Told me I was broken, told me I was flames
“Take these pills, you’ll feel better soon”
But better ain’t real in a padded room
I don’t wanna be another case file
Another name they sedate and then exile
I’m not crazy, I’m just fed up
I’ve seen more truth with my eyes shut
I’ve seen God in the glow of a trip
I’ve seen pain that don’t heal with a script
If I feel too much, that’s a gift
But they look at me like I’m glitchin’ quick
Nah…
This is my life, not your chart
I bleed ink straight from the dark
I’m not your patient, I’m the art
And I’ll break before I let you tear me apart
[Bridge – Melodic with Grit / Reflective]
I know what it’s like to feel hollow
To beg for a high you regret tomorrow
To pray for a crash just to feel the climb
To lie and say “I’m good” when you’re dyin’ inside
[Final Hook – All-In Vocals, Raw Emotion]
I been trippin’ off tabs just to find my peace
Still can’t sleep, got war in me
They said I’m sick, I said, “Tell me what’s sane?”
Poppin’ prescriptions that poison my brain
It’s my BPD, got me up and down
One day I’m the king, next day I drown
I don’t trust the pills that they gave to me