

Prompt / Lyrics
[Verse 1] He sits at parties Like a tax return Flat as soda Warm as soup Someone slips On a piece of air He just nods once Takes another sip I did a pratfall Down the stairs (totally fine) He checked his watch Asked the time I wore a chicken suit To his job He said “Interesting choice For a Wednesday” [Chorus] This is a song for the guy who never laughs We’re gonna tickle all the corners of your abs You can fight it but the giggle’s doing math Carrying the chuckle Into a full-body crash (ha! ha!) (oh no!) For the guy who never laughs [Verse 2] I hired a mime To narrate his life [record scratch] He wrote a Yelp review: “Five stars Too quiet” I trained a pug To bring him snacks It forgot the snacks Brought six more pugs We all said “cheese” For a photo op The camera sneezed Did a little cough He blinked once Twice Micro-grin detected Zoom in Enhance Laughter virus spreading [Chorus] This is a song for the guy who never laughs We’ve got bananas in pajamas doing math Serious penguins in a boardroom talking trash You can feel that tiny snicker Trying to hatch (ha! ha!) (don’t you dare!) For the guy who never laughs [Bridge] Okay Imagine this You’re in a suit Very important meeting Very serious mood You stand up slow To make your speech Your stomach just says “mmMERRP” into the mic (pfffft!) Someone’s ringtone Starts to play It’s your mom Screaming “SNUGGLECAKE” Everyone freezes Time collapses Tell me your face Is not doing gymnastics (come on!) [Chorus] This is a song for the guy who never laughs We’ve got your poker face tied up in a cast Every little smirk’s a fireworks blast Let that weird Wheezy Honking goose out at last (HA! ha! ha!) (there it is!) From the guy who “never” laughs
Tags
High-energy comedy-pop with male vocals, cartoonish brass hits, slide whistles, and boingy FX peppered between lines. Verses ride bouncy acoustic guitar and cheeky bass; chorus explodes with gang vocals, claps, and goofy vocal ad-libs. Occasional record-scratch stops for punchlines, then slam back into a tight, fast groove.
2:49
No
2/23/2026