Don’t Call Him That!

(Verse 1)

Now Bobby walks tall with his boots on tight

Says he’s five-foot-six when the light hits right

But folks ’round here, they all kinda know

He needs a stepladder just to kiss his girl hello

(Pre-Chorus)

But don’t you dare bring it up, don’t make that mistake

He’ll puff his chest out like a little ol’ snake

(Chorus)

Don’t call Bobby short, he don’t like that word

He’ll square up fast like a fightin’ bird

He’ll say, “Height don’t matter, it’s heart that counts!”

But he still keeps phone books stacked by the couch

So tip your hat and change the topic, sport—

Whatever you do, don’t call Bobby short!

(Verse 2)

He bought a big truck with a lift kit too

Needs a ladder just to get into that view

He says, “It ain’t compensation, I just like the ride”

But his seat’s got a booster that he tries to hide

(Pre-Chorus)

At the county fair he stood on hay

Just to win the prize for “Manliest Display”

(Chorus)

Don’t call Bobby short, he gets real sore

He’ll stomp his boots like never before

He’ll tell you, “I’m tall in attitude and pride!”

Then he’ll strut off with a tiny stride

So don’t be cruel and don’t report—

That Bobby’s two feet shy of the weather report!

(Bridge)

Now we all love Bobby, he’s a helluva guy

He’ll help you move or bake a mean apple pie

But if you slip and say “fun-size friend”

You might not see Bobby again…

(Final Chorus)

Don’t call Bobby short, it’s his one rule

Even if he’s eye-to-eye with a barstool

He’s big in spirit, he’s large in charm

Just don’t ask him to reach the top shelf at the farm

So raise your glass and be a good sport—

And don’t… call Bobby short!

(Outro)

Yeah, he may be small, but he’ll fight like a fort…

Just don’t… call Bobby short.