(Verse 1)
Now Bobby walks tall with his boots on tight
Says he’s five-foot-six when the light hits right
But folks ’round here, they all kinda know
He needs a stepladder just to kiss his girl hello
(Pre-Chorus)
But don’t you dare bring it up, don’t make that mistake
He’ll puff his chest out like a little ol’ snake
(Chorus)
Don’t call Bobby short, he don’t like that word
He’ll square up fast like a fightin’ bird
He’ll say, “Height don’t matter, it’s heart that counts!”
But he still keeps phone books stacked by the couch
So tip your hat and change the topic, sport—
Whatever you do, don’t call Bobby short!
(Verse 2)
He bought a big truck with a lift kit too
Needs a ladder just to get into that view
He says, “It ain’t compensation, I just like the ride”
But his seat’s got a booster that he tries to hide
(Pre-Chorus)
At the county fair he stood on hay
Just to win the prize for “Manliest Display”
(Chorus)
Don’t call Bobby short, he gets real sore
He’ll stomp his boots like never before
He’ll tell you, “I’m tall in attitude and pride!”
Then he’ll strut off with a tiny stride
So don’t be cruel and don’t report—
That Bobby’s two feet shy of the weather report!
(Bridge)
Now we all love Bobby, he’s a helluva guy
He’ll help you move or bake a mean apple pie
But if you slip and say “fun-size friend”
You might not see Bobby again…
(Final Chorus)
Don’t call Bobby short, it’s his one rule
Even if he’s eye-to-eye with a barstool
He’s big in spirit, he’s large in charm
Just don’t ask him to reach the top shelf at the farm
So raise your glass and be a good sport—
And don’t… call Bobby short!
(Outro)
Yeah, he may be small, but he’ll fight like a fort…
Just don’t… call Bobby short.