[Intro]
I was sipping just to sleep
Then I woke up in a war
Thought your love would be my cure
Turned out you were the trigger
[Verse 1]
Met you on a broke day
Pocket lint, big dreams, small pay
You laughed at my cheap café
Called me "rich in the wrong way"
We were floor mattress
Takeout boxes, late August
You traced scars on my arms
Said, "You’re more than what they marked"
You saw gold in my rust
Turned my "someday" into "us"
I swore if I lost you
I would lose the better half of me
[Chorus]
I fell so hard, I hit the bottle
You walked away, I hit the floor
Demons in my drink, they tried to swallow
Every piece of me you loved before
I almost died tryna drown that sorrow
Begging yesterday to open up the door
I fell so hard, I broke the throttle
Now I’m fighting for a reason to restore
[Verse 2]
You left on a cold Thursday
Note on the counter, half-page
Said you couldn’t fight my rage
Said you’re tired of my "almost change"
I was blaming all the bad days
On the world, on the bills, on the heartbreaks
Really it was me in the glass
Chasing comfort in the poison I made
Hit the floor in the kitchen
Face numb, heart itching
Friends calling, I ditch it
Rather talk to the rim, keep sipping
I saw my father in the mirror
Red eyes, hands shaking near
Thought I’d never be that man
Then I watched him reappear
[Chorus]
I fell so hard, I hit the bottle
You walked away, I hit the floor
Demons in my drink, they tried to swallow
Every piece of me you loved before
I almost died tryna drown that sorrow
Begging yesterday to open up the door
I fell so hard, I broke the throttle
Now I’m fighting for a reason to restore
[Bridge]
[low vocal register]
Every shot, little suicide
Every laugh, just a camouflage
Every text I never sent you
Sat unsent like a sabotage
I heard your name in the ice clink
Saw your face in the slow sink
Felt my chest start to cave in
Heard my own heart say "I think
This is it"—[whispered vocals] then a spark
From a somewhere in the dark
Mama’s voice, my little sister
Saying, "We can’t bury who you are"
[Verse 3]
So I poured it down the drain
Like a funeral for my shame
Sat shaking in that silence
Let the hurt call out my name
Therapy on the weekdays
Staring down at all my weak ways
Telling strangers how I bled
So I don’t bleed out the same way
I ain’t perfect, I ain’t holy
Still get tempted by the old me
But I’d rather feel this pain
Than feel nothing, dying slowly
If you see me in the future
Know I climbed out of that grave
Yeah, I lost the love I worshipped
But I kept the life she tried to save
[Chorus]