The weight that I carry..

There’s a weight that I carry..
Deep inside of my chest,
A hurt that nobody sees..
The kind that whispers my failures,
like a song that dies on repeat..
The kind that drags at my ankles,
while I’m trying to stand on my own two feet.. 
I carry memories like anchors,
tied tight to my past..
Moments I wish I could change, 
but they carve into my soul like glass..
I carry guilt for the times I was distant,
the times I was calculated & cold..
The nights I shut down, 
when I should’ve been tough & bold..
And now I hate how it lingers,
like a shadow bleeding off the wall.. 
Every step that I take,
Is toward a better design & not my fall….

Hook
This is the weight that I carry..
The burden I can’t hide..
The fear that I’ll fail again..
With a storm brewing inside..
God keeps telling me softly..
You don’t have to be so strong alone..
Lay down the weight that you’re holding..
& let ME carry the burden, you’ve always known.

Verse 2
My kids deserve a father,
who’s steady and true..
Not a man fighting ghosts, 
he never meant them to view.. 
They deserve open arms, 
not a guarded heart..
They deserve the whole man, 
not one constantly falling apart.. 
And here.. I’m trying to be present,
even when it hurts..
Trying to break old habits, 
before they get much worse.. 
Trying to show them, 
love in a way they can feel..
Trying to teach them that broken, 
can still learn to heal..
But some days the weight wins, 
so I stumble again..
With somedays feeling like the battle, 
is too much to defend.

Hook
This is the weight I carry
The burden I can’t hide
The fear that I’ll fail again
The storm I hold inside
But God keeps telling me softly
You don’t have to be strong alone
Lay down the weight you’re holding
Let Me carry what you’ve known

Bridge
I told God I was tired of pretending I’m fine,
Tired of dragging my past like it’s tied to my spine..
Tired of letting old wounds shape the man that I am,
like I’m less than the strength God has planned..
He said give ME the pieces,
you’re scared to reveal.. 
Give Me the parts of your heart,
you don’t think can heal.. 
Give Me the weight, 
you’ve been holding for far too long.. 
And I’ll show you that weakness 
is exactly how I make you strong!! 

Verse 3
So I’m learning to release, 
what it is that I can’t control..
Learning to forgive myself, 
for the things I stole..
Learning to breathe again, 
without fear in my chest.. 
Learning that healing is slow,
but it’s still progress..
I’ll always carry a little bit of the pain,
But it won’t be the chain that keeps pulling me back.. I’m choosing to walk forward,
even when it’s tough looking back.. 
Choosing to trust God, 
when my strength ain’t enough.. 
Choosing to let go of it all, 
I was free by his mercy & love!

Final Hook
This is the weight I carry,
but it’s lighter than it was..
Because God is here beside me,
I’m not alone anymore..
I’m learning to lay it down,
The burden is too much..
To constantly keep carrying it around….

Rap, Raw, Real, Heavy Beat, Deep Soul, Bluesy Vibe.