My kids.. They don’t know me.

My kids.. they don’t know me,

Not the way I wish they did..

They know the tired version,

The stressed out man I’ve been..

The one who snaps too quick,

The one who disappears..

Down into his thoughts.

Like hes trying to outrun his own skin,

The one who’s always fought..

They know the man who works,

The man who apologizes with lies..

The man who says tomorrow,

But tomorrow keeps slipping by..

Through the cracks in my hands,

And I hate that, I hate it bad..

I hate that they see the weight,

Before they even see my heart..

The storm before the calm,

The shadow before the man!

Hook

My kids.. they don’t know me

Not the man I want to be..

They only see the broken pieces,

Not the reasons underneath..

They just see the distance,

Deep within my eyes..

Not the anger I have,

For war inside my mind..

My kids.. they don’t know me

But Im trying to change with time!

Verse 2

I grew up learning silence

Learning to swallow pain..

Learning that men dont cry

They just break & yell shameful things..

I’ve carried that into fatherhood

Like a curse.. I never really meant

I never meant to be distant..

Never meant to be cold

Never meant to live in past tense

letting my past,

Bleed into their world..

But trauma dont ask permission

It just shows up, cold, & cruel..

It sits at the table

And eats you alive..

Until you finally stand up

And tell it to leave & hide..

God you know Im trying..

Please tell them Lord..

How I want to be present

To be kind & heard..

Not the man I learned to be

But the one they truly do deserve!

Hook

My kids.. they don’t know me

Not the man I want to be..

They only see the broken pieces,

Not the reasons underneath..

They just see the distance,

Deep within my eyes..

Not the anger I have,

For war inside my mind..

My kids.. they don’t know me

But Im trying to change with time!

Bridge

One day I hope they see,

The man behind the fear..

The heart behind the silence,

& The love behind the tears..

One day I hope they know,

I fought to break my chains..

I fought to heal the wounds,

I never meant to go away!

Verse 3

So Im showing up now,

Even when it hurts..

Even when the past,

Still pulls at my shirt..

Even when the shame,

Beats me to my knees..

or the whispers: “Im too late”..

I’m still choosing to stay,

Choosing to grow all the same..

Choosing to speak up,

Choosing to let them in..

Piece by piece, we’ll build it,

Day by day, until the very end..

And maybe they still,

don’t know me just yet..

But one day they will,

I’m just willing to bet..

Bc I’m no longer hiding,

behind this anger, guilt, nor regret..

Today I’m not drowning,

My feet are barely even wet!

Final Hook

My kids.. they don’t know me,

But they’re finally starting to see..

The man that I am becoming,

The man I can truly be..

They see the effort,

Worked with my own two hands,

Not the fear deep in my chest..

They see what is now possible,

The man I was meant to be!!