Chorus]
Don’t do drugs, my little Pop-Tart,
No leafy plants or sugar art.
Keep your hands off the mystery powder,
We’re here to party, not to get louder!
[Verse 1]
Caught you sniffing oregano, said, “What’s this green stuff?”
I said, “Not your candy, put that down, you little fluff.”
Tried to eat the glitter like it was sprinkles on cake,
Now you sparkle more than a disco ball at a rave.
You moonwalked into the fridge, stole the last snack,
Then blamed it on the cat and gave me that look back.
Danced on the couch with socks on your hands,
Shouted “I’m the boss!” while launching food plans.
[Pre-Chorus]
Tried to mix Kool-Aid with baking soda,
Said, “Science experiment!”—yeah, that’s soda!
Saw the leafy plant, thought it was a snack,
Nope, that’s not lettuce, put it back!
[Chorus]
Don’t do drugs, my little Pop-Tart,
No leafy plants or sugar art.
Keep your hands off the mystery powder,
We’re here to party, not to get louder!
[Verse 2]
You sang “Bohemian Rhapsody” to the goldfish,
Told the dog “You’re fired!” then made a wish.
Wore the toaster like a hat, tried to plug it in,
Said, “Electric fashion!”—well, let’s not begin.
Said, “Is ‘Plan B’ a snack?”—I almost cried,
Then tried to pay the mailman with a French fry.
You’re the king of chaos, the queen of fun,
But keep the weird stuff away from my rum!
[Bridge]
No drugs, no plants, no mystery dust,
Just juice boxes, glitter, and all our trust.
Pop-Tart wild with a sparkle and spark,
Lighting up the party till way past dark!
[Final Chorus]
Don’t do drugs, my little Pop-Tart,
No leafy plants or sugar art.
Keep your hands off the mystery powder,
We’re here to party, not to get louder!
[Outro – spoken with a grin]
And if you find glitter in the couch cushion,
That’s just Pop-Tart’s version of a party fusion.
Stay silly, stay wild, keep the good vibes,
‘Cause life’s way too short for boring tribes!
