Unworthy Of A Perfect God

[Verse 1]
I wake up praying with my phone in my hand
Scroll right past the verses I said I would understand
Tell you I’ll change then I chase the same high
Lie to myself, then I lie when I say I’ll try
Sunday suit
Monday sin
By the weekend
I’m back again
Same old screen
Same old shame
Wash my hands
Still feel the stain
[Pre-Chorus]
Why do You stay when I keep running?
Why do You love what I keep ruining?
I see the cross, but I still cross the line
How could You still call me Yours, call me “mine”?
[Chorus]
I keep failing a perfect God
Hands up, heart down, I’m at a loss
Every time I swear I’ll stop
I fall again, and again, and again
I don’t deserve this grace I’ve got
I break Your heart then blame the cost
If You don’t let my story end
I’ll cling to You when I can’t forgive myself
[Verse 2]
I talk about faith like it’s part of my brand
Quote a verse, then I ghost You when it’s getting out of hand
Smile in the pew, then I drown in the past
Tell everyone “healed” but I’m breaking behind the mask
Two steps forward
Ten steps back
Halo cracked
On a crooked path
Say I’m fine
But I’m split in half
You call my name
I just collapse
[Pre-Chorus]
Why do You stay when I keep running?
Why do You love what I keep ruining?
I see the blood, but I still stain my life
How could You still call me child every time?
[Chorus]
I keep failing a perfect God
Hands up, heart down, I’m at a loss
Every time I swear I’ll stop
I fall again, and again, and again
I don’t deserve this grace I’ve got
I break Your heart then blame the cost
If You don’t let my story end
I’ll cling to You when I can’t forgive myself
[Bridge]
[Beat drops to soft piano, distant guitar]
If You’re still here in my disaster (are You still here?)
Meet me right inside my fear, not after
If there’s a way that You can use these scars
Paint Your mercy on my broken heart (yeah)
‘Cause I’m so tired of cheap apologies
Saying “I’m changed” then repeat the same scenes
If You can love the worst in me
Teach my heart to finally believe
[Chorus]
I keep failing a perfect God
Hands up, heart down, I’m at a loss
Every time I swear I’ll stop
I fall again, and again, and again
I don’t deserve this grace I’ve got
I break Your heart then blame the cost
But You don’t let my story end
So I’ll trust Your love when I can’t forgive myself
[Outro]
I keep failing a perfect God (yeah)
But You keep writing me in Your song
If You still say I still belong
I’ll bring my worst, and You’ll make it strong (ooh)

rap, Moody rap-pop blend with male vocals: confessional piano over filtered trap drums, 808 swells, and distant guitar feedback. Verses in half-sung melodic rap, intimate and close-mic’d; hook opens into big emo-rock style chant with layered harmonies and airy pads. Bridge strips to piano and vocal before drums crash back for a final, soaring chorus., alternative r&b, hip hop, pop, rock, r&b, emo