I hate myself

I Hate Myself

Vibe: Aggressive vulnerability, rapid-fire flow, raw emotion.

(Intro)

(The piano fades in, cold and lonely)

I’m tired of lying to myself.

I’m tired of pretending that I’m okay with the person I’ve become.

It’s not even about what you did to me anymore...

It’s about what I do to me.

Listen.

(Verse 1)

I wake up and I’m disappointed I’m even awake

Looking at my reflection like "How much more can you take?"

I’m a master of disaster, I’m a king of mistakes

I build a bridge to my future just to watch the wood break.

I hate the way I think, I hate the way I over-analyze

I hate the way I see the truth but still I choose to tell the lies

To myself—yeah, I’m a victim of my own mind

Searching for a version of me that I’ll never find.

I’m suffocating, I’m shaking, I’m pacing the floor

I’m screaming at a god that I don’t believe in no more

Because if I was worth saving, then why am I here?

Locked in a room with my failures and a bottle of fear?

(Chorus)

And I hate myself, I hate the skin that I’m in

I’m losing every battle that I’m trying to win

I’m a ghost in the hallway, I’m a blur in the street

I’m a walking contradiction that is never complete.

Yeah, I hate myself, and I don’t want your help

I’m just drowning in the hand that I’ve been dealt.

(Verse 2)

(Flow gets faster, more frantic and desperate)

Look—I hate my voice, I hate my face, I hate the space I occupy

I hate that I’m too much of a coward to ever say goodbye

To the world, so I stay, and I rot in my room

Turning my bedroom into a personal tomb.

I’m my biggest hater, I’m my sharpest critic

Every time I feel happy, I find a way to quit it

I sabotage the good things because I don’t feel I deserve 'em

I take the lessons I learned and I find a way to subvert 'em.

I’m a mess, I’m a wreck, I’m a hole in the wall

I’m the guy who’s gonna stumble every time he tries to tall

And it’s funny how they say "just love yourself first"

How can I love a person that I honestly think is the worst?

(Outro)

(Beat slows down, piano gets quiet)

I hate that I feel this way.

I hate that I’m writing this song.

But mostly...

I hate that I know I’m not the only one.

(Beat fades to silence)