Woke Up in a Ditch (Same as Always)

[Verse 1]
Opened my eyes to a buzzard staring back
Thought I was still in hell but the sky was too blue for that
Sat up slow, spat out dirt, checked if my bones still worked
Everything crackled, everything hurt — so I guess I got resurrected, or whatever

[Chorus]
Woke up in a ditch, same as always
Resurrection's less dramatic than the gospel songs say
No angels, no trumpets, no choir singing sweet
Just a sunburn and a headache and the taste of my own feet
Woke up in a ditch
Same dirt, same sky
Guess dying's just a detour
And I'm too mean to die

[Verse 2]
Checked my pockets — no wallet, no keys, no smokes
Found a note that said "you're welcome" written in what looked like jokes
The devil's handwriting is sloppy, by the way — real shaky hand
Guess evicting someone takes a lot out of a man

[Chorus]

Woke up in a ditch, same as always
Resurrection's less dramatic than the gospel songs say
No angels, no trumpets, no choir singing sweet
Just a sunburn and a headache and the taste of my own feet
Woke up in a ditch
Same dirt, same sky
Guess dying's just a detour
And I'm too mean to die

[Bridge — spoken, squinting]
You ever come back from the dead and immediately regret it?
Sun's too bright. Ground's too hard. Somebody's playing "Achy Breaky Heart" in the distance.
[pauses, listens]
...wait.
[longer pause]
...that's just my brain.
[rubs temples]
...hell of a souvenir.

[Instrumental break — guitar stumbling around like a man trying to stand up too fast]

[Outro — sung, still groggy but finding his feet]
Woke up in a ditch, same as always
I'd say "good to be back" but that'd be a liar's phrase
I'm alive again, I guess — if that's what you call this state
Just a man, a guitar, and a whole lot of hate

[spoken, standing up:]
...now where's the nearest bar.

[boots start walking. Fade out.]

Outlaw Country, male, Tempo: mid-slow, groggy. Guitar feels hungover. Drums stumble in late.