[Intro]
mm
you know the version of me
I let people see
[Verse 1]
I learned young how to hide things
make myself easier to hold
smile right, say the safe stuff
never let the real thoughts show
so now I’m half built from masking
half built from survival instinct
people think I’m confident
because they don’t see underneath it
they don’t see the overthinking
or how hard existing gets
how one small thing can stay inside me
for weeks inside my head
[Pre-Chorus]
I spent so long becoming
what people needed from me
I forgot how to just be me
[Chorus]
who I really am
is messier than I show
soft-hearted, overwhelmed
trying not to lose control
who I really am
gets attached too deep
pushes people away
then hates the empty feeling
oh-oh
I’m harder to understand than I look
yeah-yeah
even I don’t fully get me
who I really am
is still trying to feel safe somewhere
[Post-Chorus]
(la-la-la)
too much in my head
(la-la-la)
too much unsaid
[Verse 2]
I act stronger than I feel
because weak got used against me
so now I hide pain automatically
like it’s muscle memory
I disappear when overwhelmed
go quiet when things hurt
then people think I don’t care
when really I care too much first
and maybe I built characters
just to survive being seen
because the real me never felt
like somebody people would keep
[Pre-Chorus]
I became easy to love on the surface
while secretly falling apart underneath
[Chorus]
who I really am
is tired all the time lately
trying to hold everyone together
while emotionally fading
who I really am
still carries old scars
still flinches at certain tones
still breaks over harsh words
oh-oh
I wish I felt enough as myself
yeah-yeah
without needing to become someone else
who I really am
is someone still learning how to exist honestly
[Bridge]
I’m not fake
I’m protective
there’s a difference
you don’t survive pain like mine
without learning how to hide parts of yourself
[Chorus]
who I really am
is complicated and scared
loving too deeply
while pretending I don’t care
who I really am
still wants softness somehow
still wants someone to stay
after seeing all of me now
oh-oh
maybe I’m not broken completely
yeah-yeah
maybe I’m just exhausted from surviving
who I really am…
is still here underneath everything
[Outro]
you know the version of me
I let people see
mm
…but not all of me yet
Beexii