Butterfly

As the rain pours on the window pane. From the sky's cries. My mind drifts off to meet my heart. On their rondayvoo. All because that great skin tone. The same kind that glows with the setting sun or that butterflytattoo. I made it clear. My feelings for you that hold you have on me. No I try but my heart is hung up on what could be. The pain I love the pain of that fantasy. Having a family with you seems to be my biggest dream. Steady heavy on the whiskey pour. Getting doubles to drown your memory. Wishing I could change our fate. You made it clear as day you want nothing to do with me. The misery from reality. Has me keeping a whiskey double as company. Trouble I am in trouble nothing I do seems to ease the pain. That sting of us not being a thing. Brings my heart to agony as the thought rips me apart. Dark ohhh I am in the dark to get free. This is the hardest battle I have ever faced. I can't sleep without help a bottle. You and your hold on me the hold on my mind. Is too tight seeing you in that white miniskirt. That sight makes me wish I was holding you tight tonight. Hating myself for the need to write to lessen the sting. I can't tell if it is your beauty's fault. Or your warm soul that has a hold of me. I try and I try to move on but without you it feels daunting. Having your memory haunting me. I feel like hunting all the alcohol I can drinking my self in a early grave. Saving as much as I hate it I save the memory of your voice. Just saying my name makes my heart skip a beat. I can't even get away from you in my sleep. Wishing every day I could see your face. I tried to replace you in my heart but you are here to stay. I can't get away from you no matter what I do. You are the reason my heart takes these heavy liver shots from the liquor. Waking up hating myself for last night. I say it's the last time. But you and I know that is a sad lie. The angel choirs sing I am a liar when I say it's the last time. Like a fire you consume my mind.