My beautiful angel

I was looking at you thinking “is this really my baby, how lucky am I”

When I decided to write something for you, you were laying on my chest and I was kissing your head. While you were trying to get up like a good baby. You were almost 2 months old. Your eyes, your chubby cheeks, your baby hands and feet, your eyebrows and eyelashes. I loved taking care of you, bathing you, giving you massages, putting lotions on your skin to help the dryness, feeding you, putting clothes on you and even changing your diaper. My pregnancy with you was harder than I imagined but I loved the thought of having a pregnant belly, growing a little human inside of me, it’s incredible. Even the whole process of giving birth had become something I didn’t wanna go through again, I became one of those who’d get traumatized and depressed because of it. Everyone is different but that happened to me, I felt lonely and not understood, where my needs didn’t get met, it was just an awful period for me. I would stay late night until you fall asleep, wake up a hundred times to feed you and change your diaper, I had to carry you and feeling like my back was broken to do some chores. The first 2 weeks were especially hard because I almost couldn’t move my body, and you were new to everything and even I had to learn how to calm you and know your needs. But since the moment I saw you, I said “it was all worth it”, you became the most beautiful baby. I remember how I looked at you the day after and cried because I was scared of losing you, you had become the most precious thing in my life. I would cry whenever you cry nonstop, I would have mental breakdowns when you were not feeling well because I couldn’t do anything about it, I would blame myself for whatever I ate or drank even though the doctor told me that all babies are like that. You were the little angel that came from heaven to give my life brightness when I was lost. I could never get enough of your baby smiles, especially when you were looking at me while smiling, it was like you were talking to me through them. I can’t even count how many kisses I give you in a day. My whole life changed since you came, last Christmas 2022 I found out I was pregnant with you and I stayed late night not being able to calm myself or sleep, crying nonstop and thinking how to tell your dad about you. The moment we knew you were a girl, your dad started crying, and then he said he’ll protect you with everything. You became his little princess. Seeing how he takes care of you, talks to you, plays with you, it all melts my heart - a king with his princess, I couldn’t ask for more. You were a dream that came true, I wanted a baby, to become a mom, and it happened. I can’t wait to see your future, seeing you walk and hearing you talk, becoming a toddler and learning how to write and read, becoming a teen, choosing your study, becoming an adult, getting a job, finding love, getting married and having kids - simply to see you successful and happy.

Family