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I have a plan, a wonderful plan. Nothing can go wrong if I go through with this plan it will work. I know it will work if I do this plan. There will be no dessert on the table. There's just one problem, my lifeline won't let me go through with he's still on the other side of the phone asking, how I am and I lie, and I lie, and I like say, I'm fine, say I'm fine. I know he sees through it, but I gotta. Keep lying. Because if you knew what was going on, it may ruin him so I pray that he'll hate me someday so I pray he'll forget about me. If he hated me and make this so much easier there would be no problem with what I want to do cause he's the only reason I haven't done it yet. He's the only reason I'm here. Right? No, nobody can stop me, but him so to block him out, hide, the pain must make him hate me. Anyway, I've got a million plans. I just have one that will work if he hates me. It will work. It will work, so I pray thy hill. Despise me in every way, please. Don't call, don't text me any more. I always feel so guilty when he asks if I'm okay. Cause I've never ever been worse, but I say I've never been better. I'm so happy. My life is great. I love everybody and everybody treats me, right? But I promise, I'm fine, definitely not on the line. The darkness surrounds me and I can't breathe. He's holding on to me, but if he lets go I will be free free to go to my mother's home so please hate me