Try

5 It’s kind of hilarious watching you try to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence.

13. You look like something that came out of a slow cooker.

14. I will ignore you so hard that you’ll start doubting your existence.

15. Feed your own ego. I’m bus

Survivor 49: Steven Ramm Post-Elimination Interview (2025)

To help you come up with some sick burns, roasts and funny comebacks you can use in the heat of battle, we’ve come up with 100 good comebacks. Use these when you don’t feel like being sweet as a peach the next time you find yourself arguing with a bully.

We guarantee at least one of these snarky comebacks will wipe the smirk off your enemy’s face. And the best part? You’ll walk away feeling victorious!

Related: 200 Short Jokes That Will Have You Laughing Your Socks Off

Table of Contents

Good Comebacks and Roasts

Best Comebacks and Insults

Funny Comebacks

Great Comebacks

Witty Comebacks

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You're the reason God created the middle finger insult

Good Comebacks and Roasts

1. You’re the reason God created the middle finger.

2. Your secrets are always safe with me. I never even listen when you tell me them.

3. You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.

4. I may love to shop, but I will never buy your bull.

5. I’d give you a nasty look, but you’ve already got one.

6. Someday you’ll go far. I hope you stay there.

7. Were you born this stupid or did you take lessons?

8. The people who tolerate you on a daily basis are the real heroes.

9. You should really come with a warning label.

conversation runs dry, all you need is a good, short joke to get it flowing again. Whether it’s met by the groans that accompany most dad jokes or the light trickling of laughter that meets a good pun, a funny, short joke can always put that spark back in an evening that’s gone dull.10. I don’t know what your problem is, but I’m guessing it’s hard to pronounce.

11. If I wanted to hear from a butthole, as sweet as revenge (when used appropriately). However, we know how hard witty comebacks are to come up with when you’re put on the spot.

Tripping off the beat, yeah, I'm vibing in the zone

Got my mind twisted late night, using beats like a throne

Rolling with the crew, loose screws, watch it blow

Words sharp like daggers, precision when I flow

TAZZY got the rhythm, see the way I move

Bringing heat to the track, you know I can't lose

Roses are red, and violets blue,

You wish you were pretty, and I wish too,

Turn the tables, make you fumble and fall,

This rap game's a zoo, I'm the king of them all!

Pouring out the emotions, like a fine aged wine

Got the lines that intertwine, watch my clock unwind

Trying to find the meaning in the chaos we pursue

Every rhyme's a puzzle piece connecting me to you

Got the vibe so heavy, like a bass that's profound

Feel the beat drop, make the whole world spin around

Roses are red, and violets blue,

You wish you were prett I’d fart.