Just a Peon

I show up late with a biscuit in hand

Steel-toe boots full of concrete and sand

Boss man’s already givin’ me the stink eye

Says, “Don’t touch that loader, you’ll flip it and die”

He gave me a shovel and a busted broom

Said, “Sweep the dirt — but not too soon.”

I’m just a peon from 9 until 5

My boss don’t trust me not even to drive

Won’t let me near the backhoe or crane

Says I’ll end up diggin’ my own dang grave

I hold the sign that says “Slow” and “Stop”

Sometimes he forgets I’m out there on the job

I’m just a peon, low man on site

Still tryin’ to figure out my left from right

I once poured concrete and forgot the rebar

Now that slab’s softer than a chocolate bar

Tried to run the skid steer — took out the fence

Boss said, “You’re banned from anything with a seat or vents”

They got me fetchin’ nails and chasin’ dogs

And fishin’ lunch outta muddy bogs

Yeah, I’m just a peon from 9 to 5

Hard hat's crooked but I’m still alive

Can't read blueprints but I fake it well

Dropped a hammer off the roof (shh, don’t tell)

He don’t let me measure, says I “eyeball wrong”

Only thing I’m trusted with is singin’ this song

I’m just a peon, swingin’ that broom

Dodgin’ porta-johns and near certain doom

They say, “Every man’s got a place on the crew”

Well mine’s behind a caution cone covered in glue

They don’t call me “foreman” — more like “fore-mistake”

Even the outhouse got promoted for goodness sake!

Yeah, I’m just a peon from 9 to 5

Carried sheetrock through a beehive

Stepped on a nail, boss said, “You’re fine”

Just duct tape it up and get back in line

I ain't got skill, but I bring the charm

And a lunchbox full of nothin’ but Pop-Tarts and harm

So here’s to the fellas who just survive

Makin’ sawdust dreams and lunch break lives

I’m just a peon, can’t use a jack

But I’m the first one here… when the boss ain’t back