Verse 1
Ticket agent smiled, said, "Sir, step right this way"
I looked at that metal bird and my hair turned grey
They want me in a tube going five hundred miles an hour
When my trusted old stallion only got one horsepower
I belong in the saddle, kicking up the desert dust
Not strapped to a seat that I absolutely do not trust
They got stale pretzels and a tiny little plastic cup
But there's a basic law of nature: what goes up must come up.
Chorus
If we were meant to fly, God would've given us wings!
He’d have put feathers on my vest and some aerodynamic things
I like my gravity heavy and my boots on the dirt
Where the only thing falling is the sweat on my shirt
You can keep your jet stream and your window-seat view
'Cause thirty thousand feet is thirty thousand times too blue!
Verse 2
The flight attendant yelled, "Sir, please sit back down!"
As we taxied down the runway away from the town
The engine started roaring like a mountain lion pack
My knuckles turned white and my spine went slack
We lifted off the tarmac and my stomach stayed behind
I was praying to the Lord, completely losing my mind
There's a giant piece of iron floating way up in the sky
And there ain't a cowboy living who can tell me how or why.
Chorus
If we were meant to fly, God would've given us wings!
He’d have put feathers on my vest and some aerodynamic things
I like my gravity heavy and my boots on the dirt
Where the only thing falling is the sweat on my shirt
You can keep your jet stream and your window-seat view
'Cause thirty thousand feet is thirty thousand times too blue!
Bridge
[Guitar Solo - Blazing, frantic Southern rock style, mimicking an airplane engine]
Clouds out the window, lightning on the radar screen
Scariest damn rodeo that I have ever seen
No brakes in the air, nowhere to pull over and park
Just a cowboy in a cockpit crying out in the dark!
Outro
Land that sucker!
Put the wheels on the concrete!
Let me kiss the runway!
Yeah, I’m sticking to the highway from now on.
Keep your aluminum eagle.
I’m buying a truck.
[Slide guitar whine, heavy thud of boots walking away]
Kevin Laden 
