A Minecraft Saga

Built a farm, raised some pigs,

Had a cabin by the lake with redstone rigs.

My girl said, “You’re takin’ this too far,”

I said, “Honey, don’t knock my pixel art.”

She gave me that look, packed her bag,

While I was shearin’ sheep in my diamond swag.

I lost my job, lost my girl,

All for a sandbox, block-built world.

She said “It’s me or the game,” and I laughed,

Now I’m sleepin’ in a house made of obsidian slabs.

Friends stopped callin’, my dog’s long gone,

But my zombie trap still sings like a song.

Yeah, I lost it all… in Minecraft.

Had a date once, tried to play it cool,

Took her to dinner, talked about my tools.

Said “I farm melons, breed cows by hand,”

She left before the bread hit the pan.

I built a shrine to the life I knew,

Right next to my automated bamboo.

I lost my grip, lost my tan,

Now I only talk in crafting plans.

Haven’t blinked since the 1.18 patch,

Got a portal room and a gold hoe stash.

She’s with a lawyer, I’m with a sheep,

Trading emeralds while I lose sleep.

Yeah, I lost it all… in Minecraft.

Somewhere out there she’s sippin’ rosé,

While I’m hoardin’ gravel like it’ll save the day.

I got riches, I got loot,

But no one to share my chicken root stew.

I built a throne out of beacon light...

And cried alone through the pixel night.

I lost my mind, lost my way,

But I got a castle with a lava bay.

Sure, I’m single, pale, and weirdly proud...

But my XP bar’s still crazy loud.

One day she’ll see what she walked past...

The king of nothin’ in Minecraft.