Me, Myself & Him

It’s him

Watching my reflection

Was told to be a man

Oh, be a man

To not change direction

Looking at me with distaste

Forcing me to isolate

Dismissing the struggles I faced

Kept me from myself

You stare into me

Nothing to fear but fear itself

Predicting my every move

I would have never known

I know he didn’t approve

This is what he forced me to be

Forced me to be

You look just like me

You’re not on my side

You’re choking me out

Your rules, I must abide

I feel you suffocating me

You don’t want me here

Turning me into something

This rage will set me free

He lives in my head

Every lie that you spread

If I’m losing my mind

Was it him all along?

You tell me they’re listening

So don’t let them hear you

You turn every hope I have, into fear

Into fear

You say that it’s you that I need

Then throw me the pieces and tell me how to bleed

BLEED

You’re getting louder

You won’t shut the fuck up

Keep saying I’ll never be enough

I’ll never be enough

You look just like me

I see you, only when I’m alone

All alone

Every brick & every stone

All the hate that you’ve shown

Every choice that I make

To right my wrongs

Like I’m scared of what’ll happen

If this disease is prolonged

This disease

My reflection smirks at me

Oh, It’s like he knows what I’m thinking

He knows I don’t have control

No control

He knows how to twist my words

Twisting

When I refuse to do what he says

I feel the end of a barrel against my head

If I don’t listen, I’m as good as dead

I’m dead

Why won’t he stay the fuck away?

You look just like me

You won’t let me out

Your voice burns through my soul

You show no mercy

No fucking mercy

I don’t doubt

I answer upon your calls

I have no choice

If I don’t abide by your rules

You make me plead like a fool

Plead like a fool

Let me go

Release me

You demand for control

Then swallow me whole

Swallow me whole

I can’t tell where you end or where I begin

I try to hide but you find me within

You know the hate I feel inside

Every time that I lied

Can’t escape, you’re always there

’Cause you stole my voice

And now you’re fucking everywhere

You never give, you always take

But you’re there waiting for me to break

Waiting in the dark

You turn my anger into something real

Then call it power — like that’s how I feel

Scream it louder — I know what you’ll say

They fucking don’t want you

They’ll walk away

Walk the fuck away

You scream it, over & over again

Till it burrows so deep that I call it a friend

You don’t need chains

You don’t need a fight

He just lives in the dark

And wait for the night

And the worst part is

I won’t even fight

I don’t even deny it

So yell it again…

Tell me what to believe

If you’re not really me…

What did I become?

And if I’m not real

What did you become?