Agony

Waking up in a body that’s already bruised

Feeling like I have been burnt & used

Every nerve screaming like it’s got something to prove

To prove

Hands clenched tight, I’m fighting through pain

Fighting

I can’t feel

If this is living, I don’t want to be real

I don’t want to be real

Spine like it’s breaking

Pain is overtaking

Neck like a vice

Every single movement comes with a price

They say I look fine, oh, say it again

I’m too young to be in this pain

The tests show nothing

Yet I’m feeling something

Feeding me prescriptions

But I don’t want these addictions

Addictions

I dare you to live in this hell

That’s just my life, in a nutshell

Don’t tell me just breathe

Don’t ask me how I cope

Because I’m barely fucking hanging on at the end of a fucking rope

Woke up tired in a body I don’t even own

I can’t help but feel, I’m all alone

Facing a mirror, I see defeat

They say come in, take a seat

Where does it hurt?

How bad is the pain?

Now I don’t want to alert

But I cry in vein

Every step I take, tears me apart

Every smile that I fake

Oh I can’t hold it in anymore

I’ve taken all the pain I can endure

You wish you could take it away

But I’ll be damned if I allow it

There just has to be some other way

I refuse to let you carry this shit

Pain so real like a knife in my side

Comes back full swing, I just want to hide

Stuck inside a body that fucking refuses

To be in pain whenever it chooses

They say to rest

That I’ll be fine

I’m doing my best

But I don’t have the time

You don’t feel this crawling under my skin

Where does the suffering end & begin?

WHERE DOES IT BEGIN?

I’m stuck in a borrowed body, hurting every day

Screaming

Screaming

The pain never goes away

Every nerve on fire

FIRE

Every thought is a war

I don’t even know what the fuck I’m fighting for

I’m so tired of hurting

So fucking tired

Trying to find something to take the blame

Every night I’m dying for relief

Oh I’m dying

But each time I wake,

I just feel the same

I feel the fucking same

Tear me down

I don’t want to feel

Cut the signal

Just calm down

This suffering is so unreal

TEAR ME DOWN

I DON’T WANT TO FEEL

CUT THE SIGNAL

SHUT IT DOWN

Every nerve feels frayed

Every breath feels like a fucking mistake

My body feels betrayed

Pieces of me waiting to break

Pain. Pain. Pain

It won’t let me go

It’s in my blood

Deep within

Pain. Pain. Pain.

Take another pill & swallow it whole

How do you fight what you can’t control?

There’s still pain inside

It’s killing me slowly

Slowly

I plead & beg for mercy

NO MERCY

Every part of me is breaking

Breaking

The tests show nothing,

NOTHING

You must be faking

Faking

All your pains & aching

Nothing wrong with you

There’s nothing wrong with you

Are you going to help me?

Help me

Or am I stuck like this ‘til my body just stops?