Handyman victory

Verse 1

We march with plunger, wrench, and light,

Into the darkness, ready to fight.

The Sh*t Monster rose with a sewer scream,

We flushed him down, we crushed his dream!

In the crawlspace deep, where the serpent coils,

We cut its fangs with sweat and toil.

Every hiss, every strike it gave,

We slayed that beast, the pipes we saved!

⸻

Chorus

Raise your hammers to the sky!

Handy men will never die.

From basements cold to attic flame,

We stand as heroes, we stake our claim.

⸻

Verse 2

The Hell Hounds came with a boiler’s roar,

Snapping jaws on the basement floor.

We faced their fire with steel and grit,

One twist of the wrench—and we conquered it!

Then the ghost in the attic, chilling the air,

Haunting the coils with a phantom stare.

We set the freon, banished the shade,

Air conditioner fixed—our legend made!

⸻

Chorus

Raise your hammers to the sky!

Handy men will never die.

From basements cold to attic flame,

We stand as heroes, we stake our claim.

⸻

Bridge (Epic showdown)

We looked to the heavens, the Sun God raged,

Burning our backs with a furnace blaze.

But we wore our scars like crowns of gold,

And told that tyrant, “You can’t break bold!”

⸻

Final Chorus (Triumphant)

Raise your hammers to the sky!

Handy men will never die.

We’ve fought the beasts, we’ve won the war,

The world is safe—till it breaks once more!

(Group shout outro):

🎤 “HANDY MEN FOREVER!”