See You in Hell (This Time I'm Bringing My Own Whiskey)

[Verse 1]
Last time I went down, I went empty-handed
No cash, no flask, no plan, no brandy
Stood at the gates lookin' like a fool
This time around, I'm breakin' every rule
Got a flask in my boot and a bottle in my coat
Got a backup guitar and a backup joke
The devil don't know what's comin' his way
I'm checkin' back in on my own damn day

[Chorus]
See you in hell — this time I'm bringing my own whiskey
Last time was a disaster, this time's gonna get risky
I got a seat saved right up front, don't you worry 'bout that
But I ain't drinkin' your well water or your bargain basement swill, Jack
See you in hell — save me a seat, but save your cheap bourbon too
I'm bringing my own bottle, and I'm sharing it with who I choose

[Verse 2]
The devil thought he'd seen the last of my face
Now I'm knockin' on his door like I own the place
Got a list of demands and a song to sing
"Better jukebox, better lighting, and a working everything"
He opens the door, sees me standin' there
Sighs so deep he loses some of his hair
Says "you again?" I say "miss me, sweetheart?"
He says "not even slightly," I say "good, let's start"

[Chorus]

See you in hell — this time I'm bringing my own whiskey
Last time was a disaster, this time's gonna get risky
I got a seat saved right up front, don't you worry 'bout that
But I ain't drinkin' your well water or your bargain basement swill, Jack
See you in hell — save me a seat, but save your cheap bourbon too
I'm bringing my own bottle, and I'm sharing it with who I choose

[Bridge — spoken, grinning wide]
You know what I figured out on the way back down?
Hell's only scary if you ain't been around.
I done my time. I drank their rotgut. I slept in their mold.
Now I'm comin' back like a landlord — and I'm collectin' what I'm owed.
[pulls out flask, takes a sip]
...plus, I brought the good stuff.

[Instrumental break — triumphant, messy, all guitars and grins. Like a man walking into a bar he knows he's gonna get thrown out of — and he can't wait.]

[Outro — sung, loud, free]
See you in hell — this time I'm ready!
Got my own damn whiskey and my own damn steady hand!
Save me a seat, but don't you pour a drop
'Cause I brought enough for everyone — yeah, even you, sweetheart — that's the plan!
See you in hell!
See you in hell!
SEE YOU IN HELL —
[spoken, quiet, laughing:]
...save me a seat. I'll save you a headache.

[one last chord. A laugh. Then the sound of boots walking toward the door. Then silence.]

Outlaw Country, male, Tempo: mid-fast, swaggering, confident