[ominous drone]
[Spoken word]
Well my name is Rudolph
and I've got a story to tell
We ran her over and
sent her to hell
It's about a grandma
who was in my way
as I was pulling Santa's sleigh.
She was 5 foot 5 as wide as
tall with blue gray hair
like she just at a mall.
We were kind of behind,
We had to stop for a bit
His Comet had to take a shit.
F.T.B, F.T.B
Over the woods and
through the trees
I only saw her because
I heard her sneeze.
I was moving so fast
I think my hoof went up her ass
Cuz something squishy I did feel.
I shook that shit off like I was a boss
But unfortunately for me.
F.T.B.,F.T.B
We were too low and that Shit a tree
It bounced back heading straight from me.
I Dodged left and pulled right
Thinking everything was going to be alright
Then I heard Santa start to cuss.
I knew he would be pissed at each one of us.
F.T.B, F.T.B
Dasher! Dancer! Prancer, Vixen!
Comet! Cupid! Donder and Blitzen!
Too many times I've let it slide
When y'all just shit in my eye.
No more will I just sit idly by.
Y'all pissed me off for the last time.
The rains pulled back as
Santa started his attack.
A machete did he swing.
Vixen was first to lose an ear
Santa reached back in his bag
He had a fully loaded
gun and an extra mag
As the bullets flew we knew we were through
There was nothing else we could do
As my red nose went out I let out a shout
For someone to help us out.
Next thing I knew Santa had a fire and we were all reindeer stew.
So they asked me
if I was sorry about
running grandma over.
I said she was in my way
I didn't have time to play
It pissed off Santa so
bad he decided to slay.
So the moral of the story and I suppose there is
Never shit in Santa's face he'll get pissed
Beeeep ,That , Bitch
Beeeep, That , Bitch!!!
