🔥 Cold‑Open (spoken, hung‑over, street ambience)
Burp—“Last night was cheeks, champagne, and victory cake.
The war’s won… the ass was eaten… life is goo—” HONNNKK! SMACK!
Cue the familiar screech of* 🚚 TRUCK‑KUN**—again.*
[🚨 Intro – angelic choir, anime harp gliss]
“DEUS EX BUMPER STRIKES TWICE!”
The Holy One flies through the windshield of destiny,
Straight into another dimension nobody requested.
New world, same horny disaster.
[🎤 Verse 1 – respawn & recon]
Respawned butt‑naked in a sky of pastel slime,
Achievement unlocked: “Two‑Time Roadkill, Prime.”
Dropped on a temple made of titty pillows,
Priestess purrs, “Oh Sacred Snack, rise from your billows.”
No sword, no map—just legendary sack,
My load’s still mighty; the prophecy’s back.
Scroll pops up: “Collect nine goddess cakes,”
Bruh, I just finished… well, who needs breaks?
[🎶 Pre‑Chorus – self‑aware grumble]
Last realm’s saved, now I’m speed‑running sin,
Truck‑kun hit refresh—guess we do it again.
If fate’s that thirsty, I’ll pour the jug,
Seven more realms? Fine. Hold my plug.
[💥 Chorus – repeat‑offender hype]
TRUCK‑KUN — BACK FOR ROUND TWO!
Ran me over, now I’m back to screw.
OP NERD — SEQUEL S*X GOD!
New realm, same dong, still over‑awed.
Legend says the chosen simp…
Claps cheeks across dimensions in loops—
Guess I’m on New Game+ with extra boobs. ⏳💦
[🎤 Verse 2 – new world, new weird]
Met a goth dragon with piercéd scales,
She said, “Ride me, daddy, and collect my mails.”
Quest log screams: “Deliver these nudes,”
Side mission: “Steal soap from the slime‑girl dudes.”
Meanwhile a techno‑nun drones, “Holy One, please!”
She’s got LED rosaries and silicon knees.
Slap a switch, the altar gyrates,
Now my XP bar just masturbates.
[🌌 Bridge – prophecy callback, gospel trap]
Legend said I’d bust in seven timelines—done.
So truck said “lol, speedrun,” dropped me at Timeline 8.
I’m not overpowered…
I’m issued a season pass to every cake in creation.
Praise be the bumper!
[💥 Final Chorus – full EDM degeneracy]
TRUCK‑KUN — CRUSH ME DADDY!
Every run spawns thicker baddie.
OP NERD — BUGGED IMMORTAL!
Dies on the road, respawns in a brothel.
Scrolls keep writing, nuns keep sinning,
This hamster wheel of cheeks ain’t thinning.
New realm loads, my zipper explodes—
Endless isekai, infinite modes!
🧻 Outro – tire squeal, faint angel moan
Voice of the cosmos:
“Game autosaved.
Prepare to cross again in… 30 seconds.”
Distant truck horn.
OP Nerd sighs, unzips, and grins:
“Plot armor? Nah—bumper armor. Bring it.”
