Painted Face

I learned how to walk with the weight in my veins

How to laugh through the lightning crawling in my brain

Every “you look fine” cuts deeper than knives

’Cause no one sees the wreckage underneath my eyes

I wear camouflage made of practiced grace

While my body burns like a house with no escape

And every morning feels the same

Wake up tired, pray I can make it through the day

And I’m so sick of saying

“I’m okay”

Just so nobody sees me break

So I paint on a static smile

While my body ignite inside

Every step feels like a mile

But I’m afraid to let them see me dying

I’m screaming in a silent room

Holding heaven by a thread

If I told the truth about this pain

Would you still see me the same?

My reflection looks alive enough to fool the crowd

But my hands shake when nobody’s around

And every day feels like another funeral

Another piece of me becoming unreachable

I miss who I used to be

Before survival became my identity

YOU DON’T SEE THE WAR INSIDE

EVERY DAY I WAKE UP

AND PUT ON A FACE

PRETEND IM OKAY

So I paint on a static smile

While my nerves ignite inside

Tell me how I’m meant to live

When my mind won’t let me survive

I’m exhausted from pretending

I’m stronger than I am

if I fall apart completely

Would anybody understand