[V1]
I stopped checking my phone
Stopped wondering who might call
Got tired of wanting something
That never wanted me at all
Put the weight back on the bar
Like I could sweat out who I'd been
Started fighting with the mirror
Till I recognized myself again
Found an old wreck, stripped it bare
Rust and wires everywhere
Kept my hands too busy fixing
To notice nobody was there
[PC]
I asked God to kill the feeling
Guess I learned to bury it instead
Filled my days with anything
That kept forever out my head
[C]
I wasn't looking
I was done with all of this
Got good at killing evenings
Finding things I wouldn't miss
Kept my hands busy
Kept my heart somewhere out of view
Then life put someone in my way
And somehow it was you
I didn't call it fate
Didn't think it meant a thing
But somewhere between hating you
You started getting to me
[V2]
Our first hello was mostly silence
Then a comment landed wrong
You decided I was arrogant
I decided we'd never get along
Every time our paths crossed after
We found something new to hate
A look, a joke, a smart remark
Then somehow we'd both stay
You'd get under my skin
I'd get underneath yours
Funny how we kept finding reasons
Not to walk out the door
[C]
I wasn't looking
I was done with all of this
Got good at killing evenings
Finding things I wouldn't miss
Kept my hands busy
Kept my heart somewhere out of view
Then life put someone in my way
And somehow it was you
I didn't call it fate
Didn't think it meant a thing
But somewhere between hating you
You started getting to me
[V3]
Then one night the room went empty
And neither one of us went home
Without everyone around us
You weren't who I thought I'd known
You told me things you usually hide
I gave you pieces I don't show
For a couple hours two guarded hearts
Forgot to keep the doors closed
When you left I watched you go
And hated what I already knew
I'd spent months learning not to want this
Now I wanted more of you
[B]
Maybe God ignored my prayer
Maybe I misunderstood
Maybe wanting nothing
Was never gonna do me good
But I won't call this an answer
I've been wrong too many times
All I know is when you looked back
I couldn't look away this time
[C]
I wasn't looking
I was safer on my own
I'd made peace with empty evenings
And going everywhere alone
Then you happened
Slow and inconvenient
Like a crack I couldn't close
And something I had buried
Started breathing on its own
I don't know where this is going
I'm still scared to let it move
I wasn't looking for somebody
Then I started looking for you
[O]
I asked Him to take the feeling
Maybe He never did
Maybe I just stopped listening
Until you found where it hid