

Prompt / Lyrics
[Verse 1] Showed up late to the barbecue Red cup ready, not a care or clue Buddy said, “You wanna hit this first?” I said, “Hell yeah, what’s the worst?” Took one puff, then took five more Felt my brain walk out the door Looked around and forgot my name Then I saw Jesus in a cornhole game [Chorus] Bongs before beers, that was my bad Now I’m dancin’ with a scarecrow wearin’ plaid Someone passed me ribs, I thought they were snakes Y’all, this high hit harder than my uncle's brakes So take my word, for heaven’s sake— Bongs before beers is a southern mistake [Verse 2] Granny showed up with that devil’s pie Swore I saw it winkin’ with a bloodshot eye The preacher’s kid was makin’ moonshine tea And the neighbor’s goat tried to fight me I climbed a tree to escape the lawn Turns out it was just a plastic fawn Thought I was floatin’ down the Rio Grande But I was cryin’ in a kiddie pool, beer in hand [Chorus] Bongs before beers, that was my bad Now I’m slow-dancin’ with a lawn gnome named Chad He whispered secrets from outer space And gave me a hug with his ceramic face So heed this tale for your party’s sake— Bongs before beers is a southern mistake [Bridge – spoken with background fiddle] You ever try to order pizza on a shovel? Or forget how to blink for an hour? Don’t recommend it... [Final Chorus – everyone singin'] Bongs before beers, it’ll mess you up You’ll end up spoonin’ with the neighbor’s pup One toke too fast, and you’ll start to shake Then call your ex just for old times’ sake So pace yourself and pump the brakes— Bongs before beers is a southern mistake [Outro – Fade out with party noise] “Y’all got any snacks?” “Why is the sky breathin’?” “Who the hell gave the goat tequila again?”
Tags
Upbeat, humorous, honky-tonk with stoner energy
3:01
No
4/7/2025