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[Verse 1]
Russell walks in like he owns the air,
Forcing his opinions without a care.
Every conversation’s a one-man show,
If you disagree, you’re his next foe.
Talks about principle like it’s a crown,
But all he does is tear others down.
His way or nothing, that’s his creed,
But all he plants are toxic seeds.
[Chorus]
Oh, Russell’s rules, they’re dumb as hell,
Thinks he’s a king but it’s easy to tell.
Slamming on the brakes for his “imaginary cat,”
Just another excuse for acting like a brat.
He’s all about principle, or so he’ll claim,
But really, he’s just playing a selfish game.
[Verse 2]
In Moab, he’s mad, got pulled to the side,
Left the rig behind, couldn’t swallow his pride.
Face twisted up like he’s some victimized saint,
But the cops saw through his poor restraint.
Recording others to make them squirm,
Treats every moment like it’s his turn.
It’s not about justice; it’s about control,
Russell’s just digging his own deep hole.
[Chorus]
Oh, Russell’s rules, they’re dumb as hell,
Thinks he’s a king but it’s easy to tell.
Slamming on the brakes for his “imaginary cat,”
Just another excuse for acting like a brat.
He’s all about principle, or so he’ll claim,
But really, he’s just playing a selfish game.
[Bridge]
You can’t win with a guy like that,
He’ll twist the truth just to have a spat.
Every little issue, he’ll make it a war,
Russell’s the type who always wants more.
[Chorus]
Oh, Russell’s rules, they’re dumb as hell,
Thinks he’s a king but it’s easy to tell.
Slamming on the brakes for his “imaginary cat,”
Just another excuse for acting like a brat.
He’s all about principle, or so he’ll claim,
But really, he’s just playing a selfish game.
[Outro]
So here’s to Russell, the self-made clown,
Always yelling, always bringing us down.
Principles matter, but respect does too,
And Russell, man, it’s overdue.
