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I learned your name in a room with no doors

Every mirror lying, every prayer on the floor

You said, “Kneel down, this won’t hurt long”

But time learned my face and proved you wrong

I carved your truth into my skin

Called it faith, called it discipline

You fed me hope through a needle smile

Said I’d be free if I stayed a while

You don’t scream — you breathe in me

That’s how the quiet things make you bleed

I am not broken, I am consumed

I didn’t fall — I was pulled into you

If this is love, then it hates me clean

If this is God, He’s never been kind

I begged for light, you gave me a flame

Now I don’t know if I’m saved or erased

You dressed me up in borrowed strength

Called my collapse “character and length”

Every “almost” carved deeper scars

I kept reaching up, you kept raising the bar

You said pain means I’m becoming real

So I stayed numb just to feel the deal

I stopped asking who I was before

You don’t miss things when you’re empty at the core

I learned to smile with a loaded chest

Learned survival doesn’t mean I rest

I am not broken, I am consumed

I didn’t fall — I was pulled into you

If this is love, then it hates me clean

If this is God, He’s never been kind

I begged for light, you gave me a flame

Now I don’t know if I’m saved or erased

Maybe I needed a cage

Just to call it a home

Maybe I confuse being chosen

With being alone

Tell me —

If I walk away, do I disappear?

If I stay, am I finally here?

Say my name without using fear

Say my worth without cost or year

If I am weak, don’t make it art

If I am yours, don’t tear me apart

I am not healed, I am awake

I see the price of every promise you make

If this is love, it’s a beautiful lie

If this is truth, it wants me to die

I don’t want heaven if hell feels the same

I just want back what you took in your name

I let you go.

Now tell me —

Was I lost…

or finally alone enough to live?