Aside from the obvious profane ones, I enjoy the following:
Fucktard.
Wank puffin
Cockwomble
Harold Shitmum
Dunderheid
Weapon
Walloper
8. Dog nonce (one of my friends called me this last night. Never heard it before. Genius).
9. Numpty
10. You American!From Lena Dunham's book "Not That Kind of Girl",
My work friends thought you looked like a hipster puppet. I don't care what your work friends thought of me.Couldn't organise a root in a brothel
You've got 2 brain cells mate and they are both fighting for 3rd place
If my dog had a face like yours I'd shave it's ass and teach it to walk backwards
Fuck knuckle
You got a face like a dropped meat pie
Just a few good old Australian insults for youIn a dead serious, slightly concerned tone: "You struggle with things that come easily to others, don't you?"
In was drunk and trying to send a picture of the ol' family jewels and rod to a...
MoreRide a cock-horse to Ban-bury-cross
To see an old lady upon a white horse.
Rings on her fingers, and bells on her toes.
And so she makes music wherever she goes.What is worse than a cardboard box?
A: Paper tits!
: What's the difference between a prostitute and a trapese artist?
A: One's got a cunning stunt...the other has a stunning cunt.
What is the name of Moby Dicks father?
A: Poppa Boner
What's the difference between a tire and 365 condoms?
A: One's a Goodyear and the other is a fucking goodyear
Why did the snowman smile?
A: Because the snowblower is coming.
How did the hilbilly find his daughter in the woods?
Pretty Good!
What is the difference between anal sex and a microwave
: A microwave doesn't brown your meat
What do lesbians call viagra?
A: Batteries
Whats the difference between acne and a priest?
A: Acne waits until you're 14 to cum on you're face
Why is sperm white and piss yellow?
A: So you know if you're cumming or going
: What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?
A: A quarter pounder with cheese
TracyCleveland77
