RAP BATTLES OF WHATEVER!
THE THREE STOOGES!
VERSUS!
ED, EDD N EDDY!
BEGIN!
(The Three Stooges - Verse 1)
Moe: Well, look what the cat dragged in, some knuckleheads new!
Why I oughta poke eyes in all three of you! (Threatens)
One's got a sock head, one's dumber than dirt...
Larry: And the little loudmouth? Boy, does my head hurt! (Rubs temples)
Curly: Yeah! You mugs look sillier than us, I ain't wrong!
Like somethin' broke outta cartoon-ville! Nyuk-nyuk-nyuk-nyuk! (Woob-woob-woob sounds)
(Ed, Edd n Eddy - Verse 1)
Eddy: Check it, fellas! Fossils escaped from TV Land!
Your whole act's in black and white, ain't got no colored brand!
Slappin' each other? That's your big, brilliant plan? You're lame!
Double D: Indeed! Such primitive humor, predicated on pain!
Your comedic structure, good sirs, is remarkably plain! An exercise in futility!
Ed: Pretty hat, mister! (Points at Double D, then looks blankly at the Stooges) Buttered Toast!
(The Three Stooges - Verse 2)
Moe: Scams for quarters? That's small time and weak! You puddin' heads!
We bumble through real jobs every day of the week!
You kids couldn't plumb or paint straight if you tried! Failed from the start!
Larry: That fella with the hat thinks he's smart! What'd I do wrong? (Looks confused)
Curly: I'll give ya a head bonk that'll make ya see stars! (Winds up)
Like this! (Swings, maybe hits Larry) Woob-woob-woob! Soitenly!
(Ed, Edd n Eddy - Verse 2)
Eddy: Hey! Our scams are genius! Almost make us rich! Mostly!
Better than gettin' fired 'cause of some kinda hitch!
You guys get chased outta town, we just get the Kankers! (Shudders) Or Kevin!
Double D: Your reliance on reciprocal assault truly rankles! Such kinetic tomfoolery!
Physiologically unsound, and frankly, quite grim! It lacks finesse!
Ed: Can I have gravy on my head now, Eddy? Or maybe chickens?
(The Three Stooges - Verse 3)
Moe: That's it! Spread out! You chowderheads asked for the worst!
Prepare for eye pokes 'til your little heads burst! (Advances)
We're comedy legends! You're just neighborhood pests! Put 'em up!
Larry: Are we done gettin' hit yet, Moe? Ow! (Gets poked by Moe)
Curly: Nah! We're classics! You mugs gotta admit! Undisputed!
Nyuk nyuk! Oh, a wise guy, eh? (Raises hand for a slap) Why don'tcha get outta here!
(Ed, Edd n Eddy - Verse 3)
Eddy: Legends? Of boredom! We got style, we got flair! We're famous!
Gonna buy jawbreakers with the quarters you ain't got there! You're broke!
You're old news! Washed up has-beens! Get lost!
Double D: Your comedic wellspring has demonstrably run dry! Quite barren!
A rudimentary display, lacking nuance! Oh my! Utterly passé!
Ed: (Waving arms) The Cul-de-sac is ours! Chunky Puffs for everyone! Hello!
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
kriegerdemon666
