[Verse 1]
In the land of tariffs and trade wars galore,
Came a promise of magic beans to grow more.
But farmers looked down and shook their heads,
"These beans won’t even make us fart in our beds!"
[Chorus]
Magic beans won’t make you toot,
No magical fruit to make you hoot.
They promise riches but leave us dry,
Magic beans won’t even make you fart, oh why!
[Verse 2]
Trump said, "Plant them high, plant them low!"
But all they grew were debts that wouldn’t go.
Steel costs rose like a stinky cloud,
And exports fell, leaving farmers proud... of their farts, which were still quite loud!
[Chorus]
Magic beans won’t make you toot,
No magical fruit to make you hoot.
They promise riches but leave us dry,
Magic beans won’t even make you fart, oh why!
[Bridge]
John Deere laughed and said with a grin,
"We’ve seen these beans before; they’re just a spin!"
Farmers nodded, "We know what’s real,"
Magic beans are just a silly deal!
[Verse 3]
So if you’re looking for a bean to make you go,
These tariffs won’t help; they’re just a no-show!
There’s no fuel, no gas in these empty promises made,
Just like the beans, your tariffs have no gas, they’re just a charade!
Your tariffs just have no ass,
They’re all talk and no pass!
[Chorus] (x2)
Magic beans won’t make you toot,
No magical fruit to make you hoot.
They promise riches but leave us dry,
Magic beans won’t even make you fart, oh why!
[Outro]
We can outlast these beans, you see,
For 187 years, John Deere has been the key!
So let them shout and let them scheme,
We’ll keep farming through their dream.
For in America’s heartland, one truth we know:
Magic beans won’t even make you fart, don’t you know!
DrummerDave26
