To All Of The Boys I've Loved Before

mmmmhmm
mmmmm
bum bum bum
da da da
mmmmmhmm
mmmmm
bum bum bum
da da da

it's been a long and dreary winter 
and i'm pulling out splinters 
in between my fingers
i think i've finally had enough to eat

i just want to go into the shower
and wash off years of soot
i don't want to play pretend anymore 
cause i don't have much to lose

you were my last resort until you weren't 
you just had to go and talk to someone else 
well, when is enough finally enough?
cause i'm so close to giving up

to all of the boys i've loved before, this is my final act
thanks for stabbing me in the back
i just don't have anymore to give
and if i fucking did
i wouldn't waste it on any of you
and that's the truth 

you know for every wilted petal on my doorstep 
is me drawing my last breath 
cause i had notebooks filled with each and every single one of your names
and still i was looked at as crazed 

it's not my fault that i love so damn hard
maybe if any of you had a heart
you'd understand the predicament i've been in 
sorry, but that's not a sin

and this last one i liked really hurt me the hardest
why dear God do i even get started?
cause i just know how it's going to end
me crying in my bed

you were my last resort until you weren't 
you just had to go and talk to someone else 
well, when is enough finally enough?
cause i'm so close to giving up

to all of the boys i've loved before, this is my final act
thanks for stabbing me in the back
i just don't have anymore to give
and if i fucking did
i wouldn't waste it on any of you
and that's the truth

and i pray you find yourself yearning for me
i pray all of you do
cause the last thing i want
is a picture of you 
burning in the back of my mind
i’m gonna be alright 
yes, i'm gonna be alright 

you were my last resort until you weren't 
you just had to go and talk to someone else 
well, when is enough finally enough?
cause i'm so close to giving up

to all of the boys i've loved before, this is my final act
thanks for stabbing me in the back
i just don't have anymore to give
and if i fucking did
i wouldn't waste it on any of you
and that's the truth

soulful female vocals, bluesy guitars drums and bass, lofi, swing, r&b, slow jams