I cant stop thinking

Here I am again.. laying in bed...

staring at my bedroom wall..

Tossing and turning.. and..

I probably wont sleep at all..

Laying here.. even after so many years..

getting lost inside my mind..

like a broken record..

same thoughts play over and over all the time..

I have so many questions..

to which there are no answers..

sinking feeling in my chest..

Its still hard to believe..

hard to come to terms with..

when u lose someone u love..

Life is never the same..

that person u were before is gone.. you

will never be that person again..

what went wrong..

I keep playing that day.. over again in my mind..

from wat I've heard..

u were the victim of a crime...

wat happened to u.. please

can u give me a sign

.

Why were u there all alone at the hotel that night??

I often lie awake...

thinking of u..

it hurts me so bad..

knowing wat u went through..

It makes me angry.. it makes me weak..

It makes me sick to my core..

U didnt deserve that..

why aren't the police doing more..

I don't understand..

Why this happened...

Who did this to you. how did nobody know...

Where was ur wife... .. these are the things..

I'd really love to know..

I get this sinking feeling..in my chest..

why haven't they made an arrest..

I know there's nothing I could've done..

but I feel I've failed u... for some reason..

when u lose someone u love..

Life is never the same..

that person u were before is gone.. you

will never be that person again..

how did u end up all alone in that hotel room..

I reached out to you so many times..

sent friend requests ...

u never replied..

I hope u know I tried..

I promise u Billy..

I tried..

Even though we weren't together...

we remained friends..

My heart will always be broken.. .

there's a huge piece that will 4 ever be missin'.

I..

couldn't wait to see u again..

I knew exactly wat I would say..

but now that's not happenin'

When I heard wat

happened...

it felt numb from my head to my toes...

an emptiness inside that's hard to describe..

I started saying no....

no no no no...

time hasn't healed the pain..

its always right here..

it always hurts just the same..

it never goes away..

so many thoughts run through my mind..

no matter wat I think..

nothing can fix this..

I wish I could go back in time..

do things different..

I do miss u...

I missed you back then..

the only thing that helps me cope..

is knowing..

ur in God's hands..

And one day..I will see u again..

Just know I'll be missing you..

Until then..

In loving memory... William Roberts...

A good friend an Amazing Father..

Die hard Cleveland Browns fan..