Rock bottom

“Rock Bottom”

Get up in the night

Theres no light in my sight,

Every step that I take

feels like I’m losing a fight,

I Try to climb up

but my hands keep on slipping away,

They tell me to pray, but I really lost what to say,

I been drowning for so long I myself forgot how to breathe,

Every moment just cuts, every breath just makes me bleed

They say that it’s lessons, but I’ve learned them enough,

I’m just stuck in the weight of a world that just won’t budge,

Cold nights turn to days but they all feel the fuckin same,

Like a ghost in a shell just a pawn in a game,

I scream to my god but the echoes just laugh in my face

No hero, no rope, just the end of my fate to face

Memories haunt me like ghosts in my head

Regret is the blanket that fuckin lies in my bed

They say it gets better but how the fuck would they know?

I’ve been here forever together with nowhere to go

⸻

staring at the mirror, don’t know who I see

A stranger that’s trapped in the same body as me

The fire inside is slowly starting to dim

The walls are closing in

and I don’t wanna swim

I feel like I’m just running but like time I’m standing still

Try to climb up back up but the mountains truly real

My thoughts are the cage and my mind is the key

But I lost where I put it,

so I let it be

The voices are loud, but the world is so quiet

I’m lost in the wreckage of wars I been fighting

The battle is over, but I’m still badly in pain

Survived all the scars, but they still leave a stain

If I scream,

will somebody hear through the noise?

Or is this just life, just a game we avoid?

They tell me to rise, but my legs won’t obey

So I sit in the dark, let it all fade away

Maybe the bottom ain’t where this all ends

Maybe the struggle just makes me ascend

Maybe the fire ain’t gone, just asleep

Waiting for me to wake up and believe

I’ve counted the losses, I’ve carried the weight

But maybe the past doesn’t seal up my fate

Maybe the cracks in my soul let the light

Slip through the darkness and give me new sight

If pain is a lesson, I’ll write down the page

Turn all my scars into ink full of rage

Build up a story where I make it out

Where the voices go quiet, no fear and no doubt

I won’t let the past be the chains on my feet

I’ll stand on the ruins and claim my defeat

Not as a failure, but proof that I lived

Proof that I broke down but I didn’t give in