Alcohol

It ain’t no good

Ain’t worth trying to drown it

Ain’t gonna work

Like you n me

But hell it numbs it just enough

I don’t cry

I don’t try to text you

No matter how bad I want to

I fight it

I hold em back

If you want me to

I’m here with arms wide open

And a broken heart missing yours

I know it ain’t gonna happen

Even with the prayers

And all the shots I slam down

It ain’t worth it

But fuck does it kill the hell im goin through

I’m goin down a hole

And I don’t know if I wanna come back up

Even when I’ll throw it all up

Pushin my self too damn hard

Ain’t a shard

Sharp enough to cut the grip

I’m sick n tired

But if it ain’t meant to be

Fuck it all

I don’t wanna feel a thing

I don’t wanna watch you move on

While I’m still fighting to hang on

Why am I this way

Led astray

Lost along the way

Wounded by love

The one thing that was so patient and kind to me

Turned against

I just don’t wanna feel anymore

I’d be better off dead

Than in my head

But fuckin A

I can’t stand it

You without me

And me without you

My actions are small and quiet

But this whiskey sure ain’t

It bites my lips

Burns all the way down

And Dammit if it don’t hold my hand and squeeze tighter than you did

I don’t wanna be this way but the pain made me do it

I have no desire to do hard drugs

But damn the whiskey is soft compared to them

But not as soft as your lips against mine

It won’t talk to me like you did

But hell

I don’t know anymore

I should’ve put a different kinda ring on that finger

But even then you were just bout done

Ain’t a damn thing I coulda done it seems

I just wanna get gone

But damn it all

I keep fallin

Into your imaginary arms

It’s just the whiskey I know

But damn what a blow

I forgive you

But I can’t stop loving you

Even with dry eyes and broken heart full of pain

It don’t rain like it did back then

I wanna smoke down a Marlboro red but I’ve done so good

But here we go again I just need to shut the fuck up

And take another shot

Raw from the bottle

Maybe eventually I’ll get over it

But damnit my love is lil stronger

Even numb to the touch

I feel

I see your smiling face and hear your laugh

But is it real or just a false memory

Just another heart break story

To tell my kids when they feel their first heartbeat on tell em how you could’ve been their momma

But you walked away

Or did I push you away I’ll never know

If I even make it that far

I’m already old

Gettin tired

I been through it all it seems

But hell I’m just rambling on

So I’ll leave it be

It’s in his hands

I still pray for it to work back to us

But I’ll never know

If I keep it up maybe I’ll sleep

countin sheep

1,2,3 repeat after me

I love you still Zachary